Nothing Page #3

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get a piece of our pie.

All we have to do now is sit back

and watch the place sell itself.

What's going on up here?

Come on!

Packy-packy!

- I don't know if I can do this.

- Sure you can.

Think about it.

Stretches of empty beaches

going on for miles and miles.

No phones, no cars, no freeways,

no people. No one at all.

Is this your suit?

Well, we'll get you a new one

when we get there, huh?

[Doorbell]

OK?

You're here about the house.

- As a matter of fact, I am.

- Newspaper ad, or the sign?

- The newspaper, actually.

This is for you.

- So you've already

written a number down

on a piece of paper?

Why don't you take a look at

the offer, see if it's acceptable.

- Oh my God!

- That good, huh?

Let me see.

What the hell is this?

- It's a notice of demolition.

You have to vacate these premises

or be forcibly removed.

- What? Why?

- We're tearing it down.

- The house?

- Who's "we"?

- The city, in accordance

with Section 37, Bylaw 3t 5,

which states that no area may be

zoned for residential purposes

within 100 yards of a freeway.

This house can't be here.

- But it is here.

- But not for long.

- This is my house!

You can't just take it away!

- Not without paying for it.

- We would pay for it...

- Right.

- But our records say

this address doesn't exist.

- Of course it exists!

- Not according

to our records, see?

- Well, if it doesn't exist,

how can you tear it down?

- Because it's in violation

of Section 37, Bylaw 315!

You have until 3:00!

- Today?

You can't do this!

- Sir, this house is a hazard

to vehicular traffic.

It has to go.

- Oh...

Maybe we should call a lawyer.

- Don't be stupid!

- Or...

I don't know. Uh...

Sorry.

[Phone rings]

- Don't answer it!

It's probably them!

- What are we gonna do?

- I don't know. I'm thinking!

[Doorbell]

It's not 3:
00.

- It's not 3:
00! It's not 3:00!

[Phone and doorbell]

- Stupid pencil-pushing bureaucrats!

Listen, pal!

- We're here

to tear down your house.

You ladies got any beer?

- No. And if I did,

I wouldn't give you any!

Can you believe that guy?

[Phone]

Don't answer it!

[Doorbell]

Listen, pal!

- Dave Johnson?

- Yes?

- You're under arrest.

For embezzlement.

- Oh. Hang on a sec,

let me just get my horse.

Sh*t!

- Embezzlement?

[Phone]

- It's nothing.

- This is the police!

Come out of the house!

- Sh*t! Sh*t!

- What'll you do?

- I don't know! I'm thinking!

- We know you're in there, Andrew.

- What did you do?

- Nothing!

- This guy is going to rot

in f***ing hell!

- I didn't kiss her!

I didn't kiss anybody!

- Fire!

[Phone ringing]

[Coughing]

[Doorbell]

- Stan!

It's OK, Stan.

[Coughing]

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