Mother's Day Page #2

wondering if I'll be

at the mall today after school.

I've got to answer him.

Is this "him" your,

uh, boyfriend?

Dad, stop. Please.

What?

Oh, my God.

Seems like a reasonable question

for a father to

ask his daughter.

Hey, Vicky,

you know, we should go.

We're going to be

late for school,

and you, don't be late

for soccer practice this time.

I won't.

Mom was never late for practice.

No, she wasn't.

Can I drive?

Absolutely not.

No, look, we're all going to end

up in a place like this someday.

All right?

I don't want to rush it.

What?

That was just like

the old Dad, making jokes.

Yeah, I guess.

So, listen, Dad.

After I get my license,

could I maybe, you know,

drive Mom's Volkswagen?

No, no, no, I'm going to sell it.

I told you that.

Come on, Dad.

Pretty please?

It's literally just

sitting in the garage.

Absolutely not.

Well, thanks for

thinking that over. Great.

I'm Adam Freeman.

Thanks for joining me here

on HSN from our headquarters

in St. Petersburg, Florida.

Right now, I would like to send

it over to Atlanta, Georgia,

where the very lovely Miranda

Collins is on her book tour.

Hello, Adam.

Hello, Atlanta.

Hello, viewers.

So, Mother's Day

is getting so close,

and we have these gorgeous

crystal mood pendants.

It is the perfect gift for Mom.

These genuine quartz

crystal mood pendants

change color with your mood.

Now, wouldn't it be nice to know

if your mom is

happy or sad or mad?

Oh, we have just sold

our 800th pendant!

Bingo!

Oh, God, I know that look.

You hate the float.

No, it's not the float.

It's just all this

Mother's Day stuff

and I start thinking about

how I haven't talked to Mom.

I don't even remember what our

stupid argument was about.

Oh, let me refresh your memory.

She saw a picture of you

and Russell on Facebook,

and even though he's a doctor,

she threatened to disown you

if you continue to date a man whose

skin was darker than a Frappuccino.

Okay, I get it.

Look, you can always call her,

not that I understand why you

would want to, or Skype.

She's into that now.

Our parents have the Internet?

How do they do that

with a rotary phone?

Hmm. Fancier trailer park?

Well, when are you planning on

telling them about you and Max?

Never.

I'm engaged to an investment

banker named Steven.

We have not set the date yet.

He has low sperm count

and I'm in therapy.

That's my story.

Maybe if you tell them about you two

first, it'll soften the blow for me.

Don't even try to piggyback

your secret on my secret.

Besides, she's in Texas.

We're fine.

Yeah, we're fine,

just motherless

this time of year.

There's a reason we

moved here to Georgia.

She ruins everything, remember?

Rate this script:5.0 / 2 votes