Lucky Numbers Page #5

Synopsis: Winter, 1988: Harrisburg PA's celebrity weatherman, Russ Richards, is broke: he's borrowed heavily to open a snowmobile dealership, and it's still unseasonably warm. Gig, his seedy pal, advises him to run an insurance scam; when it goes awry, Russ is out another $10,000 and in trouble with Dale, a bat-wielding thug. Gig convinces Russ to rig the state lottery with the help of Crystal, a gold-digging ditz with a heart of tin. They have to find a beard to buy the ticket, and then they have to cash it. Soon, murder and various double-crosses add to Russ's nightmare. A lazy cop zeroes in. Jail is closer than riches. Will Russ have to choose between his money and his life?
Genre: Comedy, Crime
Director(s): Nora Ephron
Production: Paramount Pictures
  2 wins & 1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
5.0
Metacritic:
31
Rotten Tomatoes:
22%
R
Year:
2000
105 min
$9,534,013
Website
317 Views


I mean, the actual extraction

process is the easiest bit.

And, uh, that's that.

All that's left is between

You and your insurance company.

End of story. Easy as pie.

I, of course, would command

the standard 20 percent consultation fee.

- I figured that.

- You know, it's up to you, Russ.

I mean, only if you're ready

for something like this.

That visit to the podiatrist.

Well, it's like removing a bunion

or something.

An ingrown toe nail,

at the very most.

Funny. Okay. Okay.

Well, make the call then.

Good choice.

I was in the right place, but

it must've been the wrong time

I was saying the right things

but i must've used the wrong line

- I was on the right trip

- All right.

Let's do this cocksucker.

- [Continues]

- All right. Let's do it.

I've been running

trying to get hung up in mymind

This is so cool. You can just

come in here anytime you want.

Yeah, i got the keys, don't i?

All right. This one's

for Charlie Hustle, okay?

The pricks wanna keep him

out of Cooperstown?

I wasin the wrong place, but

it must've been the right time

- Home run.

- I wasin the rightplace

It's happening right this second.

Send a squad car now!

I was in the right world,

but it seemed like a wrong, wrong

- [Sirens Wailing]

- Come on. Move it!

Let me just ask you one question,

Your Honor. Where's my bat?

Don't worry about your bat, a**hole.

[Phone Ringing]

[Ring]

- Yeah?

- I'm gonna break your f***ing face.

- What?

- You better have a bag of money...

the f***ing second they set bail,

or i'm telling them who hired me.

I also want an extra ten grand

for my pain and suffering.

- Are we clear, weatherman?

- No, we're not clear.

We're the furthest thing from clear.

I don't even know who you are.

Look. A second ago i was asleep.

And two seconds ago, i was

in a blueberry field with my mother,

and we were getting along

really well.

Save that for your psychiatrist.

I want my ten grand.

Stop it! Stop saying that!

- I don't have ten grand.

- Oh, no?

You'd better sell something

or kill someone. I don't care!

You just get me my f***ing money!

- What...

- [ Dial Tone ]

[ Sighs ]

Okay, Russ.

It's gonna be a better day.

- [Woman] Russ Richards! Hi!

- How are you?

Merry Christmas.

Okay. Mmm.

- Scoop-a-doop, Russ, love.

- What are you doing here?

- Problem.

- What?

Dale the Thug's getting a bit pissy

about his ten grand.

Dale the Thug? Dale the Thug?

That's his nickname?

When did that happen?

Oh, that's childhood issues.

Trust me, you don't wanna know.

He was fine for a day or two,

but now he's had time to stew, see?

Good morning.

What can I get you?

- Can I have coffee? With milk.

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Adam Resnick

Adam Resnick is an American comedy writer from Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. He is best known for his work writing for Late Night with David Letterman. Additionally, Resnick co-created and wrote for Get A Life with Chris Elliott. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Lucky Numbers" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 25 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/lucky_numbers_13029>.

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