Little Children Page #2

pinch you with my pinchers.

Yeah?

Well, when I come back

I'm gonna ram you

with my rammer.

- Ready?

- No, you won't.

Every time you win,

diesel!

I know.

- Hello!

- Mommy's home.

The jester's cap was something

that truly disturbed Brad.

All day long the boy ate,

played and napped in it.

But the moment his mother stepped in

the house he had no more use for it.

As if the entire day

up to that point

had been a pointless

and somewhat useless charade.

You got some sun

today, didn't you?

Did Daddy forget

the sunscreen again?

What are you doing?

That's his full name.

What's your favorite thing about him?

Um...

I like to come over

to his house.

Hmm.

I think I'm gonna finally break down

and get a cellphone.

- Really?

- Mmm.

Why?

I have no way of reaching you

when I'm out with Aaron.

You're done,

right?

You've got one.

Don't you think it's

strange that I don't?

Yeah, I do.

You just never wanted one before.

Yeah, I know.

There's a family plan.

We can talk for free.

Okay.

Let's just see where we are

at the end of the month.

Yeah?

Are your hands okay?

As was her custom each week

night after dinner,

the boy's mother sent Brad

down to the municipal library

to study for the bar exam.

But he never quite made it through

the door of the building.

Brad had been watching

the skateboarders for weeks now,

sometimes for as long

as an hour at a stretch.

But he never received the slightest

acknowledgement from any of them.

He'd been the same age as these

boys when his mother died.

- You do that!

- No way!

- Nice.

- Hey, that was nice, dude!

"I must have been like this,"

Brad sometimes thought.

"I must have been

one of them."

Awful.

He should be castrated.

Quick and clean,

just chop it off.

Then you wouldn't have to worry

about notifying the neighbors.

You know what else

you should do?

Nail his penis above the entrance

to the elementary school.

You know, as a warning

to other perverts.

You think

this is funny?

I just can't believe you want to

castrate a man for indecent exposure.

My brother used

to expose himself when--

when we were teenagers.

He'd do it in my bedroom,

he'd do it in the dining room,

he'd do it in the back seat of a car.

He'd always figure out a way to do it so

that nobody could see him except me.

Didn't you

tell anyone?

No, I didn't want

to get him in trouble.

Maybe he should

be castrated.

It's not the same thing.

He wasn't doing it to strangers.

Oh my God, there he is.

After all this time,

two days in a row.

Where's the fire?

Maybe he needed a vacation.

From what?

From being

the prom king.

It's a dirty job,

but someone's gotta do it.

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