I Love You, Beth Cooper

- Whoa.

- Oh.

- It's okay.

- Sorry.

- Sorry.

MAN:
All right.

- Mr. Cooverman, hi.

- Hey! Hello.

I've never known you to

do anything so reckless...

...really at all reckless.

Well, thank you.

Uh, no. That is not

what I would expect...

...from somebody

who is going to Stanford.

You know one call from me...

...and you could be going

to Harper Community College.

That would be unimaginable.

You can't...

Look, I don't know why I did th...

Who was that?

That wasn't me.

I was under an influence.

- Are you drunk?

- What?

I just meant my thinking

had been compromised.

- Look, Rich told me if...

- Rich Munsch?

Yeah.

I wouldn't take heterosexual

advice from Rich Munsch.

But he was right.

I mean, I had to do something.

I'm not there in her brain.

She will have no memory of me.

So?

So? Come on, Dr. Gleason,

haven't you ever been in love?

(BOTH MO ANING)

MAN:

Your nipples are so weird.

Denis, there's another

Beth Cooper out there.

One just for you.

You embarrassed me.

Uh...

But it was so sweet,

I'll have to let you live.

(SIGHS)

Well, that's good.

Because I like to live.

Is it like 800 degrees

in there, like boiling?

Actually, the boiling point of water

is 212 degrees Fahrenheit...

...100 degrees Celsius.

I am so hot.

I can imagine...

...that you're hot.

Hey. So I'm not gay, dude.

Rich, hi.

Hello, hi, hey. Hi.

I didn't realize

there was a line here.

No, no, that's okay.

I gotta go.

Halt! I mean, wait.

There's a little soire

at my house tonight.

Course that's redundant...

...I don't know what

I'm talking about.

No, a party. More of a party than

a French thing. Music, drinks, prizes.

Party.

- Sounds fun.

- It is fun, will be, in the future.

And goddamn it,

you're invited, officially.

Wow.

Thanks.

...ZIP's 98401,

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