Ernest Goes to Jail Page #2

I'll get that job.

Why, that man is putty

in my fingers.

I'm just toyin' with him now,

like a kitten with a June bug.

I was just thinking that, uh,

- Yeah, like a...

- Since you're not working tomorrow

that maybe we could get

together,

talk about the job,

maybe have dinner.

Dinner?

Did you say "dinner"...

like just the two of us

in the same town on the same

day in the same restaurant,

possibly at the same table?

Well, yes, but...

just as friends, right?

I mean just as friends. I mean, we'll

get together, we'll talk about the job.

I can give you

some, uh, insights

based upon my experience.

Experience.

Oh, yeah.

Well, I suggest you bring

your willpower, young woman.

Be forewarned... the

Worrell charm is merciless.

Oh, sure, Charlotte.

You just want to show me...

the ropes.

You just want to give me

a leg up to the bottom rung

of that little ladder

called "success."

Oh, yeah.

Come on, Rimshot.

We have to choose

just the right ensemble.

No.

Too formal for dinner.

Ah, the perfect choice...

European styling with

a decidedly American flair.

Charlotte has more

than a professional interest

in yours truly.

And who can blame her?

I've never understood

why I have such a profound

effect on women,

but why argue with success?

Yeah, I'm a man who has just

found his parking space

in the fast lane.

Who knows what lies ahead

for such a man?

Aah-aah-aah-aah!

Aah-aah-aah-aah-aah-aah!

Aah-aah-aah-aah-aah-aah!

Aah-aah-aah!

Ahhhhhh...

Wh-o-o-o-oa! Uh!

Well, there's my problem

right there.

Looks like this little wire's

got a little sh...

...hhhhhhhhhhhhh...

...ort in it.

Gosh! Not again.

Woman:

Oh!

Bonsoir.

Dinner for two?

Right.

I'll be your waiter

this evening.

You may call me Philippe.

I'll just give you a moment

to look over your menu.

I had a long talk

with Mr. Pendlesmythe today.

It took a lot of convincing,

but he agreed to accept

your application

for the clerk's job.

He did?

But the thing is...

y-you've got to be

more careful.

I just know I can win him over.

We'll have that little talk

around the old water cooler

about... team sports

and transmissions,

jock itch... things that just guys

talk about, know what I mean?

I'll have him eatin'

Right out of the palm of my hand.

I know that its hard, Ernest,

But Mr. Pendlesmythe can't stand mistakes.

And between you and I,

I don't think he can stand people, either.

Oh, thats okay.

I'm not like other people, know what I mean?

Frankly, Ernest,

I don't even know

why you want the job.

I mean, he's a horrible man

to work for.

At least where you are now,

you only have to see him

once a day.

Want to hear something

really funny?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes