Dead Shack Page #2

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That was super trashy of me.

What?

It was funny.

Uh uh.

What?

Nope!

Ok, alright.

Put it down!

Ok, just leave the condiments

alone.

Please.

I swear both of you are adopted,

you know that?

( laughing ) That's some funny

sh*t, dude.

Seriously, you should come

by my dad's cottage.

You know, I'm gonna start

my own business-

Blue chips, paint chips, stocks.

Yeah.

Yeah, we like to go

to the casino-

Paint chip stocks?

Yeah.

Seriously, you should

come to my dad's cottage,

it is so chill.

Hot tub.

So. Chill.

Um...

excuse me, I need to...

get through...

Hey! Hey, broskis!

Can you let the kid through,

please?

Dude.

I think that kid just got

his first period.

What a fine young woman

you've become.

( chuckles )

Sweetie, don't let the big bad

bros scare ya.

They might look pretty

but they ain't that smart.

I like you guys better drunk

and quiet.

The more you drink the less you

talk and the more I like you.

Hear that, bro?

She thinks we're pretty.

Why don't you go get the rest

of that taken care of, sweetie?

Alright, thanks.

I'll just...

Yeah, let's get lit!

Don't forget to thank

the nice lady, Jason.

Don't forget to ask your friend

for a tampon, Jason.

( laughing )

( door slides open )

I had coffee.

I saved you some sausages.

You like sausages, don't

you, Lisa?

Colin.

Yeah.

Of course she likes sausages.

( laughing )

We're talking about penises.

Couldn't find somewhere further,

could you?

Seriously, Roger.

Yeah, seriously, dad.

It's the cheapest place

that I could find on Craigslist,

alright?

You think that I can

afford a place that is not

in the middle of nowhere

or potentially dangerous?

Hey, you picked him.

He's my dad so I have

to like him.

You guys are bonding.

That makes me feel

all warm inside.

Don't settle, Lisa.

It's nice being out of the city,

eh, Summer?

Touching nature.

Being able to be in touch

with nature.

Yeah, Jay.

You can touch nature

all you want, there, buddy.

No, I just meant...

it's nice to spend time

and uh...

can I grab your bag for you?

Knock yourself out,

boy scout.

( groans )

This place looks like

a murder cabin.

Jay, you should keep

my sister close

so she can protect you.

( weak laugh )

You know, it doesn't say

it in the instructions

but I mean there's gotta be

a hidden key

around here somewhere,

right?

High-tech security.

Safe.

Shotgun the best room!

You can't shotgun what you

can't see, dumb-ass.

Nyuuuh.

Ok, watch the booze, Rog.

I am not spending a week

in here sober.

( snorts )

Women. Am I right, big guy?

( chuckles )

Let me help you

with that.

Oh.

This is nice.

Dad, this place sucks.

What're you talking about?

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