Creepshow 2 Page #2

(Car starting up)

(Ray) Oh, this is good country, Martha.

It'll come back to life some day.

It'll come back to life.

I'll finish your war paint

tomorrow, Chief. (Chuckles)

That's a promise.

How!

(Roars with laughter)

Go ahead, boys. Take what you want.

Wait a minute.

You... you can't just come in here...

Shut up, white eyes. Just shut the f*** up.

Or I'll shove something in your mouth

to keep you quiet.

Hey, Sam. Why don't we shove this

in his mouth?

(Whirring)

No! Shove this in his mouth.

Heep big! (Cackles)

You're disgusting.

Sam Whitemoon, you're a disgrace

to your people.

I said shut up, old man.

Your uncle Benjamin was just here.

He's one of the best men I know.

Hard to believe the same blood flows

in your veins.

I guess you don't hear so good, shitface.

I said shut up!

We're just here to do a little shopping.

We didn't get everything we needed

last time we were in.

You asked us to leave.

Remember, old man?

You were stealing things.

(Scoffs) We're stealing things now.

Why don't you ask us to leave, pruneface?

(Drawling) Yeah, why don't you

run us out of town, Sheriff?

Ask us nice. Say please.

- Pretty please, with sugar on it. Rarrr!

- (Cash register tings)

- Is this all the cash you got?

- That's all.

- Empty your pockets.

- I haven't got...

Empty your f***ing pockets, a**hole.

(Sam) Or I'll ask my buddy to bring me

something off the hardware shelf

that I can use to slice off your fingers.

(Crashing)

Fat Stuff

When we came in the back,

I saw a purse. Go get it, lady.

(Cash register closes)

Move, lady, or I'm gonna blow off

your old man's... (Navajo)!

- Any cute stuff back there...

- (Slap)

.. I'll pull this trigger.

- This thing work?

- What?

The photo machine, does it work?

Yes.

(Sam) Look at this.

Phooo, look at this sweetheart.

Tell me this ain't a movie star.

What, are you kidding?

They gotta make me a movie star.

Hey, as soon as they see this hair,

they're gonna say, "Sam,

"get over here.

"Get in front of these cameras.

"There's 100 million women out there,

"just waiting to run that hair

between their legs. "

Nine years it took me to grow this hair, man.

I'm not just f***ing around here.

I'm going to Hollywood, man.

This hair is gonna get me paid and laid.

Over here, lady.

(Louder) Over here, lady.

Now, I want you to stand right over here

and don't move, OK?

Give me that.

(Buzzer and whirring)

Look at this.

Look at this.

Hey.

Hey, you know that movie,

about the guy that's got, like,

superpowers and sh*t because of his hair?

Then this b*tch cuts his hair off.

And he gets weak.

He gets like an ordinary guy.

You know that movie?

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