Are You Here Page #2

Lots of people

have squinty red eyes,

insatiable thirst,

and trouble walking.

He could be diabetic

or something.

You're right.

I'm sorry.

The bearded

and bespectacled doctor

murdered at least

26 patients,

making him one of the world's

most prolific killers.

So Steve, how's it

looking out there today?

It's about time we saw

some of this warmer weather.

Well, Victoria,

let's get things started

with a little shot

of the harbor

and some seagulls

enjoying the sunshine.

How you doing there,

fellas?

Today's high will get up

to about 65 degrees

with unlimited visibility

which means if we could get this

Knucklehead out of the way,

you could see clear down

to Ocean City.

Coldest spot in the nation?

Why, that honor goes to...

Bismarck.

Smooth as silk.

That seem to you

like someone on drugs?

...and at 100% humidity

and 89 degrees

little Hilo, Hawaii

is both the hottest

and wettest spot

in the nation.

I guess that makes it

the number one destination

for teenage boys,

eh, Victoria?

I guess so, Steve.

So I know

I don't have to tell you

that showing up with

enough time for us to know

that you're going to be here,

and in condition to work

is 90 percent of it.

And why the f***

are you paying attention

to your computer?

Are you ever going

to friend me?

You think

you're irreplaceable?

You have this job because you're

handsome and you can talk.

And people trust me.

No one trusts you.

You think you're going to move

to a bigger market?

Not with that nose.

You know, I could just

as easily demean your job

if I had any idea

what it entailed,

and honestly,

I kind of resent you

making this

so awkward for me.

What are you

talking about?

Well, I need a little money

till the end of the month.

It's the sixth.

Look, I didn't say

give it to me-.

It's just an advance.

You know what

the good thing is?

I know you can't go on

like this forever.

Guys like you

count on that,

but what if you're wrong?

Fire drill?

I really doubt that.

I just want to see my friend.

Step away

from the door, sir.

I'm only going

to ask you once.

You'll break the door.

F***ing local ditwad...

Wait a second.

I know that guy.

- You what?

- I said I know that guy.

- Everybody calm down.

- I have a yellow belt!

Jesus, Ben. Let her go.

Told you I just wanted

to see my friend.

I'll... I'll pay

for the plant.

My dad died.

Don't you...

No, no, no!

And could I get

some Visine please?

Great.

I mean, would you like your

kitty cat to be used as bait?

You have three-and-a-half

pounds of crayfish.

I need three-and-a-half

pounds of crayfish.

What the hell

is going on?

I was telling him

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