Adventure in Baltimore

---

NARRATOR:
What could be more symbolic of America

than today's schoolgirl?

Intelligent, restrained, dignified...

BIG BAND MUSIC PLAYS

Oh...

We still haven't gone back far enough.

Let's look at the girl of 1913.

HORN HOOTS:

ENGINE BACKFIRES

Let's go further back, shall we? The girl of 1905.

Now, there WAS a girl.

Demure, sedate, obedient.

I'm sure we can do better than this if we just put our minds to it.

- It isn't very good, is it?

- A good artist isn't made overnight.

You've only been with us a short time.

I'll help you when we begin soup plates.

Miss Ingram, can't I start my REAL art classes?

There's no nicer accomplishment or better foundation for a woman than china painting.

I've got a foundation. I've been painting at home for years.

Let me see, now. I don't know where else I'd put you.

What about the life class?

Oh, that's too advanced. Next year, perhaps.

I take the girls out in the country and we all do a landscape.

Cows, trees, some charming sycamores not far away.

Miss Ingram, we don't understand each other.

I mean a life class. The human figure.

Rembrandt says it's the basis of all design.

That's what I need. My anatomy's terrible.

The human figure?

You mean...unclothed?

- Certainly.

- Uh! Miss Sheldon!

Oh...

Miss Sheldon, I want to have a talk with you.

Go into my office.

TRAIN WHISTLE HOOTS

- Good morning, Dr Sheldon.

- Good morning.

TRAIN APPROACHES

- Hello, Papa.

- Hello, Dinah.

I'm glad you're here, dear, but your telegram didn't make it clear

why you're home ten days before your vacation.

Anything wrong?

Well, sort of.

Suspended?

- Expelled.

- TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS

How's Momma?

Fine.

And Gene?

He's fine, too.

So are Mark and Sis. So is Ada.

So am I.

How are the neighbours?

Tom's fine.

How are YOU?

Fine.

Papa, if this was the first time I'd had trouble,

you wouldn't think it was my fault.

I don't think so now, dear, unless you say it is.

- She called me immoral.

- Who did?

Miss Ingram. Merely because I wanted to paint the human figure.

If I can't be a good painter,

there's nothing in life worth going on for.

Any other basis for this charge of immorality?

Yes. I said two petticoats were enough.

She said no respectable woman wears less than five.

And that I shouldn't have gone to a political meeting.

I said, "How can women be intelligent if they don't know about politics and economics?"

She said I wasn't there to be intelligent, but to be a lady.

I said I didn't have to learn that...

SHE CONTINUES TALKING

HORSE NEIGHS:

..Then she called the debate off, after I'd spent DAYS writing my speech!

It was about votes for women.

She said I was immoral,

merely because I went to a political meeting alone.

She said I was to write her a letter of apology and stay in my room on Sundays.

I said I wasn't immoral, and I couldn't write the apology,

and she said I was and I must, so...here I am.

I don't see how anyone could have expelled you, Di.

I don't see how they could have gotten a word in edgeways to do it!

No, Papa.

Dinah, I... don't like you being expelled.

Miss Ingram's right. Immorality takes many forms.

Yes, Papa.

But I don't believe anyone should be punished or expelled

because of the difference between two petticoats and five.

Nor for going to a political meeting.

But I would prefer you not to go alone to them.

Yes, Papa.

- Hello, Momma!

- Hello, dear!

Well, you look all right.

Is anything wrong at school, dear?

I was...expelled.

Expelled? Dinah...but what for?

For er...three petticoats, Lily.

- Why do you think she's home before vacation?

- Shhh!

Children... Andrew... Sit down.

Everything's ready.

Gene... Mark...

Sis...

In order to save you from a severe case of indigestion

caused by prolonged curiosity...

..your sister Dinah has been expelled.

- CHILDREN ALL TALK AT ONCE

- Grace.

HALTING TROMBONE PLAYING

TROMBONE:
"My Bonnie Lies Over The Ocean"

Gene, can't you play anything else?

Oh...ishkabibble.

SUDDEN BURST OF TROMBONE

Come on, Miss Dinah.

Your momma ain't paying me 50 cents a day to sit still.

- I'll be done in a minute, Ada.

- The washing won't be.

Do you mean to say we only pay you 50 cents a day?

Why, that's wage slavery.

Things will change when we women can vote. You'll be emancipated.

Been emancipated.

Dinah!

- Haven't I asked you?

- I need models and I can't afford to pay them.

- Can't you find someone who will sit still for nothing?

- Only if they're unconscious!

When I unpacked for you, I found...

Where did these things come from?

- Boxing gloves, Momma.

- Yes, I know.

A man on the train helped me with my case.

I started talking to him and he turned out to be James J Jeffries.

He gave me the gloves as a souvenir.

He even showed me his special punch he used on Bill O'Brien.

Dinah, nice girls don't speak to strange men.

Ada... I think we need more starch in these shirts.

Yes!

Momma, didn't you hear what I said? I met James J Jeffries.

Yes, I heard you. And I want you to remember not to talk to strangers.

Momma, a man like that isn't a stranger.

He's the world's champion.

When a man reaches that eminence, he's not a stranger.

He belongs to his public.

When I'm a famous painter, I'll belong to my public.

Great artists never lose touch with the little people.

It would comfort me if you didn't lose touch

with the dustpan and broom.

Start with the back porch, dear.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes