Napoleon Dynamite Page #2
Bow to your sensei.
Bow to your sensei!
Okay.
Now, I'm gonna give you
one chance.
One chance, people.
Give me your best shot.
All right.
That was pretty good. Okay.
Now, watch this, everybody.
Grab my arm.
The other arm.
My other arm.
Now watch this. I'm just gonna break
the wrist and walk away.
Break the wrist, walk away.
- Geez!
- Okay.
It's just that simple.
Now, I want you to kick me.
Come on. Kick me.
Okay, do it again.
Do it again.
- Ouch.
- Okay. You'll block it every time.
Have a seat.
Now, in addition to
what you just saw...
if you study with my eight-week program,
you're gonna learn these things.
First off...
Rex Kwon Do,
we use the buddy system.
No more flyin' solo. You need somebody
watching your back at all times!
Second off, you're gonna learn
to discipline your image.
Do you think I got
where I am today...
because I dress like
Peter Pan here?
Take a look at what
I'm wearing, people.
a roundhouse kick to the face...
while I'm wearin'
these bad boys?
Forget about it.
Last off...
my students will learn
about self-respect.
Do you think anybody thinks I'm a failure
because I go home to Starla at night?
Forget about it!
Now, for only $300,
you can sign up right now...
for my eight-week program.
Well, that place
was a rip-off.
Hey, Lyle.
[Moos]
[Moos]
Nothin' on here works smooth.
- [Gunshot]
- [Screaming]
## [Piano]
## [Soft Rock]
## [Continues]
## [Ends]
[Chattering]
So me and you are pretty much
friends by now, right?
Yes.
So, you got my back
and everything?
What?
- Never mind.
- [Chattering]
- Have you heard about the dance?
- Yes.
Have you met anyone to ask yet?
No. But I probably will
after school.
Who you gonna ask?
That girl over there.
She braided my hair one time--
Summer Wheatly? How the heck
are you gonna do that?
Build her a cake
or something.
Yeah, my old girlfriend
from Oklahoma...
was gonna fly out here
for the dance...
but she couldn't 'cause she's doing
Is she hot?
See for yourself.
Wow.
Yeah, I took her to the mall to get
some glamour shots for her birthday one year.
- I like her bangs.
- Me too.
[Chattering]
How long did it take you
to grow that mustache?
A couple of days.
I wish I could grow one.
Are you gonna eat your Tots?
No.
Can I have 'em?
You see that girl
over there?
She came over to my house
the other day.
- Why?
- I don't know...
but she left all this crap
on my porch.
She's pretty good-looking.
Do you dare me
to go talk to her?
Sure.
I see you're drinking one-percent.
Is that 'cause you think you're fat?
'Cause you're not. You could be
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"Napoleon Dynamite" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 2 May 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/napoleon_dynamite_14482>.
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