Zerophilia Page #3
LUKE:
Oh, I'm a paramecium. That's way
more evolved. I'm practically pond
scum.
MICHELLE:
Maybe I'll give you a call when the
truck's ready.
LUKE:
Great. You mean to go out, right?
Michelle smiles, and walks out through the squeaky door at
the back. Keenan approaches.
KEENAN:
(a whisper)
Whoa. That was her! Jesus, you're
sweatin' like crazy.
Luke sits, nods 'yes,' wipes BEADS of SWEAT from his brow.
LUKE:
We're goin' out.
Keenan gives him a high-five. Luke smiles, catching his
breath.
INT. LUKE & KEENAN'S PLACE
A small, run-down house. Hockey gear, dirty laundry and
Keenan are strewn across the garage-sale sofa. He munches a
burrito while watching the game.
LUKE (O.S.)
KEENAN! COME HERE, QUICK!!!
Keenan leaps up.
KEENAN:
WHAT?!
He races down the hall, sliding on the linoleum.
10.
BATHROOM:
Luke, a towel around his waist, stares at himself in the
mirror, horrified.
LUKE:
Look! My chest!
Keenan looks, clueless, a little uncomfortable now.
KEENAN:
Yeah?
LUKE:
I had hair. Come on! Not a lot,
but you've seen me -some- right?
KEENAN:
Okay, I don't know. So?
LUKE:
Well, where'd it go?
Keenan takes a bite of the burrito in his hand, now mashed.
KEENAN:
I really thought you gettin' laid
was gonna' help. What is it with
you, man? I mean, you're smarter
than me, you're better lookin' than
me.
LUKE:
I am not.
KEENAN:
I know. But I'm just sayin', you
can get any girl you want.
LUKE:
Easy for you, you've got Janine.
KEENAN:
I'm still workin' on my GED. How
long you think Brainiac's gonna'
wanna' hang with that?
LUKE:
She worships you.
11.
KEENAN:
Man, I'm gonna' be that wild fling
she had with the local dude from
the bike shop. "God, what was his
name?"
LUKE:
You're crazy.
Keenan gives him a look of "I'm crazy?"
KEENAN:
You're gonna' have a great time
with her tonight. Just be
yourself. ...Mostly.
Cheap elegance. Luke and Michelle dine on the patio, strung
with far too many white lights.
MICHELLE:
I caught him with my best friend.
Former. Such a cliche'.
LUKE:
Sorry.
MICHELLE:
Winthrop Hawkins. "Hawk." From
this Park Avenue family. He'd know
what kind of mushrooms those are,
what the best wine is.
LUKE:
The best wine is beer.
MICHELLE:
I'm such a moron.
LUKE:
You're not.
MICHELLE:
No, I am. I have incontrovertible
proof.
She kicks off her shoe and sticks her bare foot on the table,
a TATTOO of a GREEN BIRD on her ankle.
12.
MICHELLE (CONT'D)
It's a hawk. Get it? "Hawkins?"
See, you're smirking!
LUKE:
I'm not.
MICHELLE:
And it's GREEN! That's the one
color tattoo they can't REMOVE!
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"Zerophilia" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 2 May 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/zerophilia_732>.
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