The Producers script
The Producers (1968)
Synopsis: The Producers is a 1967 American satirical comedy film written and directed by Mel Brooks and starring Zero Mostel, Gene Wilder, Dick Shawn, and Kenneth Mars. The film was Brooks's directorial debut, and he won an Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay. Although the release date was officially 1968, the premier took place in Pittsburgh on 22 November 1967. Decades later, the film was selected for preservation in the National Film Registry and placed eleventh on the AFI's 100 Years...100 Laughs list. It was later remade successfully by Brooks as an acclaimed Broadway stage musical, which itself was adapted for a 2005 feature film starring Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick.

INT. DAY. HALLWAY OUTSIDE OF MAX BIALYSTOCK'S OFFICE.

CLOSE-UP OF LITTLE OLD LADY. She blows a kiss and WAVES

GOOD-BYE.

CUT TO CLOSE-UP OF MAX BIALYSTOCK. HE RESPONDS WITH SIMILAR

GESTURES.

CAMERA PULLS BACK TO FULL SHOT. LEGEND ON FROSTED GLASS OF

BIALYSTOCK'S OFFICE DOOR READS:

MAX BIALYSTOCK - THEATRICAL PRODUCER

LITTLE OLD LADY BEGINS TO DESCEND STAIRWAY. SHE STOPS,

TURNS, BLOWS ANOTHER KISS AND ONCE MORE WAVES GOODBYE.

BIALYSTOCK GRACIOUSLY ANSWERS IN KIND.

BIALYSTOCK:

Don't forget the checkee. Can't

produce playees without checkees.

LITTLE OLD LADY:

You can count on me-o, you dirty

young man.

CAMERA BACK TO BIALYSTOCK'S FACE FROZEN IN A LITTLE GOODBYE

SMILE. THE LITTLE OLD LADY'S FOOTSTEPS. BEGIN TO FADE.

BIALYSTOCK'S FACE QUICKLY RESUMES ITS NORMAL EXPRESSION --

DESPAIR AND DISGUST. HE THEN REACHES INTO HIS VEST POCKET,

PULLS OUT AN OLD-FASHIONED, POCKET WATCH AND EARNESTLY

CONSULTS ITS FACE.

CAMERA STAYS WITH HIM AS HE RUSHES INTO HIS OFFICE.

BIALYSTOCK MOVES WITH A QUICK SHUFFLING GAIT TO HIS DESK.

FROM THE TOP OF IT HE PICKS UP A FRAMED PHOTOGRAPH.

CAMERA INSERT:
CLOSE-UP OF PHOTOGRAPH. IT IS FACE OF LITTLE

OLD LADY WHO HAS JUST LEFT.

CAMERA BACK TO BIALYSTOCK. HE OPENS DESK DRAWER. IT IS

FILLED WITH TAGGED KEYS. HE PICKS UP A KEY.

CAMERA INSERT:
TAG ON KEY READS: INVESTORS FILE.

CAMERA BACK TO BIALYSTOCK. WITH PHOTOGRAPH IN HAND, HE

MOVES ACROSS HIS OFFICE TO A LARGE, DOUBLE-DOORED CABINET.

HE UNLOCKS CABINET.

CAMERA SHOWS CABINET INTERIOR FILLED WITH HUNDREDS OF

SIMILARLY FRAMED PHOTOGRAPHS OF LITTLE OLD LADIES.

CAMERA BACK TO BIALYSTOCK. HE PLACES PHOTOGRAPH IN ITS

PROPER NICHE AND BEGINS TO LOOK THROUGH THE FACES.

CAMERA SLOWLY PANS ROWS OF PHOTOGRAPHS, BIALYSTOCK'S P.O.V.

2.

BIALYSTOCK:

(Voice Over)

"Hold me, touch me', 'hold me,

touch me', 'hold me, touch me',

where is 'hold me, touch me'? Ahhh

... here we are. 'Hold me, touch

me.'"

CAMERA STOPS PANNING AND REMAINS ON ONE OF THE PHOTOGRAPHS.

BIALYSTOCK'S HAND MOVES INTO THE FRAME AND PICKS UP

PHOTOGRAPH.

CAMERA MOVES IN TO CLOSE-UP OF PHOTOGRAPH

DISSOLVE THROUGH TO MATCHING CLOSE-UP OF SAME FACE WE HAVE

JUST SEEN IN PHOTOGRAPH.

CAMERA PULLS BACK TO REVEAL LITTLE OLD LADY IN REAR SEAT OF

LIMOUSINE. EXTERIOR. DAY.

CAMERA KEEPS MOVING BACK TO EXTERIOR OF LIMO AS IT MOVES

ALONG THROUGH NEW YORK'S THEATRICAL DISTRICT.

LONG SHOT. 45TH STREET. SAME LIMOUSINE PULLS UP IN FRONT

OF ONE OF THE THEATRES THAT LINE THE BLOCK.

MEDIUM SHOT. CHAUFFEUR BRISKLY HOPS OUT, AND SMARTLY OPENS

REAR DOOR. THE LITTLE OLD LADY EMERGES. SHE LOWERS HER

VEIL AND FURTIVELY DUCKS INTO THE BUILDING ENTRANCE.

INT. MEDIUM SHOT. DILAPIDATED THEATRE OFFICE BUILDING. THE

LITTLE OLD LADY ENTERS. SHE RAISES HER VEIL, CHUCKLES

GLEEFULLY, AND BEGINS TO ASCEND THE STAIRS.

MEDIUM SHOT. UPON REACHING THE LANDING, SHE SPOTS THE FIRST

LITTLE OLD LADY COMING DOWN. SHE QUICKLY DROPS HER VEIL.

THE FIRST LITTLE OLD LADY DISCREETLY HIDES HER FACE WITH HER

PURSE AS THEY PASS EACH OTHER ON THE LANDING.

DISSOLVE TO FOURTH FLOOR LANDING. THE LITTLE OLD LADY MAKES

HER WAY TO THE TOP. SHE HANGS ONTO THE BANISTER FOR SUPPORT

AS SHE CATCHES HER BREATH. SHE RAISES HER VEIL, REACHES

INTO HER PURSE, TAKES OUT A SMALL FLACON OF PERFUME AND

SPRAYS DELICATELY BEHIND BOTH EARS. THOROUGHLY COMPOSED,

SHE APPROACHES BIALYSTOCK'S DOOR. SHE RAPS ON THE DOOR

THREE TIMES IN QUICK SUCCESSION, WAITS A MOMENT, RAPS TWICE

AND THEN THREE TIMES AGAIN. SUDDENLY THE DOOR IS FLUNG OPEN.

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Mel Brooks

Melvin James Brooks is an American actor, comedian, filmmaker, composer and songwriter. He is known as a creator of broad film farces and comic parodies. more…

All Mel Brooks scripts | Mel Brooks Books

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"The Producers" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2017. Web. 20 Nov. 2017. <http://www.scripts.com/script/the_producers_918>.

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