Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Page #5

JOEL:

I don't have one.

CLEMENTINE:

I'll go on the dole. Like my daddy

before me.

JOEL:

I noticed your hair. I guess it made an

impression on me, that's why I was pretty

sure I recognized you.

CLEMENTINE:

Ah, the hair.

(pulls a strand in front of her

eyes, studies it)

Blue, right? It's called Blue Ruin. The

color. Snappy name, huh?

JOEL:

I like it.

CLEMENTINE:

Blue ruin is cheap gin in case you were

wondering.

JOEL:

Yeah. Tom Waits says it in --

CLEMENTINE:

Exactly! Tom Waits. Which song?

JOEL:

I can't remember.

CLEMENTINE:

Anyway, this company makes a whole line

of colors with equally snappy names. Red

Menace, Yellow Fever, Green Revolution.

That'd be a job, coming up with those

names. How do you get a job like that?

That's what I'll do. F*** the dole.

JOEL:

I don't really know how --

CLEMENTINE:

Purple Haze, Pink Eraser.

JOEL:

You think that could possibly be a full

time job? How many hair colors could

there be?

CLEMENTINE:

(pissy)

Someone's got that job.

(excited)

Agent Orange! I came up with that one.

Anyway, there are endless color

possibilities and I'd be great at it.

JOEL:

I'm sure you would.

CLEMENTINE:

My writing career! Your hair written by

Clementine Kruczynski.

(thought)

The Tom Waits album is Rain Dogs.

JOEL:

You sure? That doesn't sound --

CLEMENTINE:

I think. Anyway, I've tried all their

colors. More than once. I'm getting too

old for this. But it keeps me from

having to develop an actual personality.

I apply my personality in a paste. You?

JOEL:

Oh, I doubt that's the case.

CLEMENTINE:

Well, you don't know me, so... you don't

know, do you?

JOEL:

Sorry. I was just trying to be nice.

CLEMENTINE:

Yeah, I got it.

There's a silence.

CLEMENTINE (CONT'D)

My name's Clementine, by the way.

JOEL:

I'm Joel.

CLEMENTINE:

No jokes about my name? Oh, you wouldn't

do that; you're trying to be nice.

JOEL:

I don't know any jokes about your name.

CLEMENTINE:

Huckleberry Hound?

JOEL:

I don't know what that means.

CLEMENTINE:

Huckleberry Hound! What, are you nuts?

JOEL:

I'm nut nuts.

CLEMENTINE:

(singing)

Oh my darlin', oh my darlin', oh my

darlin' Clementine? No?

JOEL:

Sorry. It's a pretty name, though. It

means "merciful", right?

CLEMENTINE:

(impressed)

Yeah. Although it hardly fits. I'm a

vindictive little b*tch, truth be told.

JOEL:

See, I wouldn't think that about you.

CLEMENTINE:

(pissy)

Why wouldn't you think that about me?

JOEL:

Oh. I don't know. I was just... I don't

know. I was... You seemed nice, so --

CLEMENTINE:

Now I'm nice? Don't you know any other

adjectives? There's careless and snotty

and overbearing and argumentative...

mumpish.

JOEL:

Well, anyway... Sorry.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes