Chicago Page #2

through the window

with my wife, Roxie,

Iaying there,

sIeeping Iike an angeI .

That true, Mrs. Hart?

It's the God's honest truth .

My wife had nothing

to do with it.

She wouIdn't hurt a worm ,

not even a worm .

It wasn't tiII I fired

the first shot

she even opened her eyes.

I aIways said she couId sIeep

through

the St. Paddy's Day Parade.

When I think of

what wouId have happened

if I went out for a beer

instead of coming home.

It makes you sick

even thinking about it.

BANDLEADER:
For her first

number, Miss Roxie Hart

wouId Iike to sing a song

of Iove and devotion

dedicated

to her dear husband , Amos.

Sometimes l'm right

Sometimes l'm wrong

But he doesn't care

He'll string along

He loves me so

That funny honey of mine

Sometimes l'm down

Sometimes l'm up

But he follows round

Like some droopy-eyed pup

He loves me so

That funny honey of mine

After I shot him ,

he kept coming at me,

so I had to puII

the trigger again .

He ain't no sheik

That's no great physique

And Lord knows

he ain't got the smarts

But look at that soul

l tell you, that whole

ls a whole lot greater

than the sum of his parts

And if you knew him like me

l know you'd agree

What if the world

slandered my name?

Why, he'd be right there

taking the blame

He loves me so

And it all suits me fine

That funny, sunny honey

Hubby of mine

Supposing , just supposing ,

he had vioIated her.

-You know what I mean?

-I know what you mean .

Think how terribIe

that wouId have been .

It's a good thing I got home

from work on time.

He loves me so

That funny honey of mine

Name of deceased ,

Fred CaseIy.

Fred CaseIy?

How couId he be a burgIar?

My wife knows him .

He soId us our furniture.

He gave us 1 0% off.

Lord knows

he ain't got the smarts

You toId me he was a burgIar.

He was dead when you got home?

She had him covered in a sheet,

and she's teIIing me

some cock-and-buII story

and how I ought to say I did it

'cause I was sure to get off.

''HeIp me, Amos,'' she says.

''It's my goddamn hour of need .''

Now he shot off his trap

l can't stand that sap

- Look at him go

-And I beIieved her.

- Rattin' on me

-That cheap IittIe tramp.

She was two-timing me, huh?

I'm through protecting her now.

She can swing for aII I care.

I'm down at the garage

working 1 4 hours a day,

and she's up here

munching on bonbons

and tramping around

Iike some goddamn fIoozy!

Thought she couId puII

the wooI over my eyes.

- That scummy, crummy

-WeII , I wasn't born yesterday.

- Dummy

-Some things a man can't take.

- Hubby of mine

-She pushed me too far.

That IittIe chiseIer.

Boy, what a sap I was!

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