Butter Page #2

that good at anything.

Oh... What? That's crazy.

Everybody's good at something.

Not me.

My last mom told me so.

Well, you don't have to worry about

stuff like that anymore, OK?

- OK.

- So if you need us, you know.

- We'll be out there.

- Yeah. "Paging Mom and Dad."

- OK. OK.

- All right.

One, two, three, Camp Butter!

I've always said that your

people are the small flashlights

that help a dark world

find its lost car keys.

- What?

- Let's hear it for Camp Butter!

What can I do you for, Orval?

Look, the panel's

been doing some talking,

and, uh...

you've had a good run.

Well, 15 years.

You're a legend.

You're in Parade Magazine.

You're the Elvis of butter.

But we just kinda feel

like it's time...

...you gave

somebody else a shot.

Uh-huh.

We're prepared to offer

you a spot at State.

Um... you could be a judge.

With me and Mary Alice

and Carl Hudgens.

- Carl Hudgens is a good guy.

- He's a great guy.

It's time to start giving back.

You know, like Oprah does.

Yeah, well, she's got

that Angel Network.

I just have one

sort of delicate question.

- Laura?

- Laura.

You know,

I really think that Bob

could be an excellent mayor.

or even, or even governor.

'Cause I know she's...

...she's very, uh... involved.

Oh, she's fine.

She'll be fine.

Laura...

These f***ers have no idea

who they're dealing with.

We're the motherfucking

Picklers.

Clearly Orval wanted you

out of the way.

I have always known

what kind of man he was.

I never thought

he'd go this far.

You know Orval is a good man.

He has had it out for us

from day one, Bob.

I will call the governor.

That's what I'll do.

I'll call the governor.

Or Jesus. I mean, don't you

have his direct line?

My constitutional rights are being

violated and I will call the governor.

The governor

doesn't care, Laura.

What did you say?

The governor doesn't care.

Whose side are you on, Bob?

It's time to pass

the baton, Laura.

I need to start giving back.

Like Oprah.

How dare you

bring Oprah into this?

Kaitlen, sweetie.

Could you please provide your

father and me with some privacy?

She can stay.

Cover your balls, Dad.

I see what happened here, Bob.

You didn't stand up

for yourself, did you?

That's what happened here.

I think it'd show a real touch

of class if we stepped down now.

I guess Dad was right when he

warned me against marrying someone

whose biggest dream was to be

the middle school principal.

- What's that supposed to mean?

- It just means maybe I should've taken his advice

- and married Boyd Bolton.

- Boyd Bolton?

At least he inherited a

successful car dealership.

I am done.

I doubt Boyd would just give up Bolton

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