American Satan Page #2
you f***in' weirdo.
Oh.
Hey, have a little faith in me.
(RADIO FREQUENCY STATIC)
And the boys on my left,
they just arrived in town and
hope to be the next big thing!
Hey, you guys know
what hope is, don't you?
Hope is the little old lady
in Vegas
with a bucket full of pennies.
Three sevens. Three sevens!
We're actually f***ing here!
Right, when are we gonna go
meet up with the record label?
Oh, you know what, better yet
let's get our booking agent
to line up some local gigs
before the tour, yeah?
Right. Settle down, sunshine.
I know you're excited.
Management deals with all that.
All the business.
- The record label...
- Oh, right, f*** of course.
Well, let's just meet up with him
now. Yeah? He sounds brilliant!
You've already met him.
- Come again?
- Um, yeah, um...
I'm the manager. Yeah. Hi.
- Um, four, five years now.
- Five years.
Right. Bollocks. For real,
let's get on with it. Come on.
- Where's he at?
- What's wrong with this pecker?
That's f***ing daft, mate!
You're a roadie who's never been on
the road before not a f***ing manager!
Yeah? I managed to get you from
some shitty little pub in England
with your four shitty fans
from the Sunset strip.
- It's not a bad start! Whoa!
- You're f***ing dead!
- Stop him! Stop him!
- Calm the f*** down, man.
- Listen! Ricky might work in mysterious ways.
- Yes.
- We do have a plan.
- Mysterious?
- F***ing pathologically lying and mysterious, man!
- All right, listen.
Just wait until you meet Johnny.
Ricky found him on line what?
- Four? Four.
- Four years ago, yeah.
- Four years ago and we've been writing together ever since.
- (SIGHS)
- Over webcam.
- Yeah.
(SIGHS) Webcam?
You've never even met this kid
in real life before, have you?
- No. No. No. But, okay.
- (EXHALES)
You want the coolest job
in the world, yeah?
- Guess what, you've got to work for it.
- Not wrong.
Right.
(GROANS) Fine.
F*** both of you.
- Ouch.
- Why's he such a cock?
What's the plan then, man?
Uh, I say that we move into our new
spot. Just chill out. Shoot the breeze.
- Wait for the other guys to get here.
- Like it. I am in.
Fine. Good. I'm f***ing
knackered. Let's get on with it.
- Where's it at?
- We're here.
What?
- What's the code, man?
- No code.
Hop in!
(SCOFFS)
We're living in a van.
Yes. It's rock 'n' roll.
Now stop being
such a whiny c*nt and get in.
Go on.
I get the back row
and that is nonnegotiable, man.
(JOHNNY YELLING)
- Hello!
- (ALL CLAMORING)
- F***!
- Yes!
How have you been?
Dylan, man, I heard so much
about you, seriously, dude.
Right, right. Yeah well it's probably
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