Elf script
Elf (2003)
Synopsis: Buddy (Will Ferrell) was accidentally transported to the North Pole as a toddler and raised to adulthood among Santa's elves. Unable to shake the feeling that he doesn't fit in, the adult Buddy travels to New York, in full elf uniform, in search of his real father. As it happens, this is Walter Hobbs (James Caan), a cynical businessman. After a DNA test proves this, Walter reluctantly attempts to start a relationship with the childlike Buddy with increasingly chaotic results.

BABY'S POV

He gleefully skitters across the floor towards a large, fuzzy teddy bear in SANTA'S BIG RED BAG.

FADE TO:

INT. SANTA'S WORKSHOP

A bevy of ELVES with slightly larger 60's Elf collars and sideburns celebrate another successful Christmas. Several elves start CHANTING for a speech. SANTA, seated in his rocker, stands to applause. Merrily, he gestures for quiet.

SANTA:

Alright, alright...Well, we've had another successful year. Prancer was able to control his bladder over Baltimore, and we didn't forget Delaware...

A party HORN blows. LAUGHTER. Santa cheerfully pats down with his hands for quiet.

SANTA:

And now after a lot of hard work it's time for a vacation, starting now!

Santa looks at his watch as five seconds click off. The elves all rest their heads on their elbows.

SANTA:

Alright! Vacation's over! Back to work! Time to start preparations for next Christmas.

The elves cheer and get back to work. When an OFF-SCREEN COOING is heard.

SANTA:

What in the name of Sam Hill...?

More COOING. Perplexed, Santa looks down to his bag just as a human baby, dressed only in a diaper, crawls out and smiles.

Silence. The elves stare in awe at the strange visitor. An ELF looks on the back of his diaper and sees the brand name "Little Buddy Diapers".

ELF TWIN #2

It's name is Buddy. He must've...

ELF TWIN #1

...snuck into your sack at the orphanage. What do we do, Santa?

Santa looks befuddled.

PAPA ELF (V.O.)

Santa had a decision to make. But fortunately when it comes to babies, Santa's a push over. So Buddy would stay with an older Elf who had always wanted a child, but had been so committed to building toys, he had forgotten to settle down. Yes, Buddy was raised by me, his adopted father. My, how I love that boy.

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"Elf" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2017. Web. 19 Nov. 2017. <http://www.scripts.com/script/elf_1094>.

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