You and Me

Synopsis: An altruistic department-store owner hires ex-convicts in order to give them a second chance at life. Unfortunately, one of the convicts he hires recruits two of his fellow ex-convicts in a plan to rob the store.
Director(s): Fritz Lang
Production: Paramount Pictures
  1 win.
Rotten Tomatoes:
94 min

You cannot get something for nothing.

And only a chump would try it.

Whatever you see that you really want...

you may have, provided you buy it.

You'd like to live a life of luxury

wearing ermine wraps,

a bracelet perhaps

or this sparkling gem.

Remember they cannot belong to you

until you pay for them.

You cannot get something for nothing

You've got to lay it on the line.

The cars we ride in

you have to pay for them.

The wines we thrive on

you have to pay for them.

The food we live on

you have to buy.

You must supply

The do-re-mi.

You speak of things that money

cannot buy

For instance, can you name a few?

Just try.

Beauty to attract the man you love.

You have to buy.

Gems of art to cultivate the mind

You have to buy.

Even vim and vigor and good health

you have to buy.

Sunny skies and mother nature's wealth

you have to buy.

Cheese and roses

Snow tubes and statues, perfumes and pistols

piccolos and dynamos,

garbage cans and feather fans

candy sticks and building bricks

silver chests and booby tests

aeroplanes and streamlined trains.

Let's see the color of your dough.

You cannot rearrange a plan

made by man

since the world began.

You cannot get something for nothing.

Only a chump thinks he can.

Put it back.

Put what back?

Come on, give.

I never did it before.


Why did you do it this time?

Satin. I never had a satin blouse.

Are you going to turn me in?

Please don't.

You don't know what it is to want

something terribly.

To want it so much that...

Is something the matter, Miss Roberts?

Yes, there is.

Look, there's a sludge on the front.

You certainly have a right to complain.

If you come with me to the

adjustment desk...

Of course.

Miss Roberts will take care of you.

I hope you won't hold this against

the Morris store.

I'm sure we can straighten it out,

can't we?

Oh, yes.

And thank you.


You are a swell guy.


Now listen.

Just because I'm a pushover,

don't get the idea the next one will be.

Beat it.

And the next time you want a satin blouse

wait until you can pay for it.

Yes, mam.


Don't thank me. Thank Mr. Morris.

He hates having scenes in his store.

All of the little kiddies

like this here goosy gander rocker.

It's cute, ain't it?

But I think it's goofie-looking.

But most little kiddies like the

goosy gander rocker.

Look, honey. Look.

Well I don't like it and you're

a shiffless skunk.

Now, listen, sweetheart...

all the little kiddies like the

goosy gander rocker.

and you're gonna like the

goosy gander rocker

or I'm gonna wrap the goosy gander rocker

around your fat little neck, get me?

Yes, sir.

Okay, lady.

She'll take it.

Oh, pardon me.

Darling, are you sure you like it?

Oh, yes, mother, I just love it.

You have the real child psychology.

That's what I like about Morris's.

It's salesmen are so specialized.

Are you the man who sold me

this thing?

Yes, mam.

You told me it opened cans.

Lady, that ain't the half of it.

This little thing is one of the wonders

of the ages.

It's a screwdriver, a bottle opener,

a cheese slicer,

ice pick and vegetable parer.

If it had one more little gadget,

I'll bet it could cook.

It doesn't open cans.

Oh, yes it does.

Now you watch me.

Now first, you do like this.

That's to make the touch a little more sensitive.

then you grab it like this and turn it

to the right

then to the left, then you listen...

You act more like you're opening a safe

than a can.

Ain't that funny how them habits

hang on?

Jerome, I've never seen anything

so brazen in my life.

The man practically admitted

Rate this script:(0.00 / 0 votes)

Virginia Van Upp

Virginia Van Upp (January 13, 1902 – March 25, 1970) was an American film producer and screenwriter. more…

All Virginia Van Upp scripts | Virginia Van Upp Scripts

FAVORITE (0 fans)

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:



    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)


    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:


    "You and Me" STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 23 Apr. 2021. <>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    You and Me

    The Marketplace:

    Sell your Script !

    Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web!


    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.

    Thanks for your vote! We truly appreciate your support.