When We First Met

---

Hi. Sorry to interrupt.

I just wanted really quickly

to say thank you so much for coming

and for sharing

such a perfect evening with us.

It's been so perfect

that I think the only day

that could possibly rival it

is the one that resulted in all of us

being here in the first place.

And that night was exactly

three years ago today.

And it was on that night that I knew I had

met someone really, really special.

Aw.

It was the night when we first met.

Excuse me.

Whoa, Black Elvis. It's a good song.

Oh. Cool. Going to Coachella?

Excuse me. Coming through.

What is she dressed as?

- Whoo-hoo!

- Hey, watch it, buddy!

Whoo! Hulk smash!

- Are you okay?

- Oh, my God. I think so.

You are A League of Their Own, right?

- Yeah.

- I love that movie.

Okay. What character am I?

I'm getting, like,

a Tom Hanks vibe from you.

- No?

- No. I'm Dottie Hinson.

I'm Geena Davis's character.

- Okay, that makes more sense.

- Are you my lesbian cousin Shannon?

Yes. I was gonna ask if you wanted

to join my softball team.

- I have a second guess.

- Who?

- Are you Garth?

- Excellent!

You know, the key to doing

a good Garth impression

is to make your mouth

into a tiny little butthole.

That was good.

- Noah.

- I'm Avery.

It's nice to meet you.

So, what is your favorite drink?

Grapefruit juice with vodka

and three maraschino cherries.

Okay. Where are you from?

All over the place. Kind of an army brat.

I don't really like that term,

but that's what they call it.

Well, I was a regular brat,

and I still don't like that term.

Let's see it.

Okay, so, it's a work in progress.

- Okay. All right.

- It's not totally done.

Ta-da!

- Oh, it's good!

- You hate it.

It looks drunk, admittedly.

- You're quite the artist.

- Thank you.

See what's going on over there

between Sexy Grumpy Cat

and the hipster Where's Waldo?

Look, they're gonna fall in...

Oh-ho! Now watch.

Everyone's gonna jump in.

Let's party! Whoo!

Whoo!

- Maybe not.

- Wow. Now they're making out in the pool.

That's kind of tacky.

Wait. I think I know that guy.

His name is Patric with no K.

- That's a bad name.

- We went on one date.

He literally spent the entire time

teaching me about sea turtles.

Well, at least you know someone here.

I just came with my roommate, Carrie.

And there she is,

making out with Jell-O Shot Doctor.

Hey, do you wanna get out of here?

- Yeah.

- Yeah?

- Do you like jazz?

- Do I like breathing?

God, this place is so awesome.

How'd you find out about it?

Well, I kinda know a guy that works here.

- Ooh!

- It's me.

- I'm that guy.

- Yeah.

- Did you get that?

- I got that, yeah. Yeah.

Actually, I am the piano man...

who's got magic hands.

Oh, my God!

- So, is there anything you'd like to hear?

- Mmm.

Do you know any Count Basie?

Whoa! You are a jazz fan.

- I am, mm-hmm.

- Wow. I love Count Basie.

- I'm more of an Oscar Peterson fan.

- Okay.

His friends call him OP for short.

Do you know him?

- No.

- He's dead, so you can't know him.

Well, I appreciate a guy

who knows his music history.

In that case, sit back and relax

and enjoy this Count Basie classic.

Okay.

This is not Count Basie!

Uh-oh! Piano solo!

You said piano solo, didn't you?

- Oh, my God! New mission!

- What's up?

Okay, okay. Hey, do not forget

to tip your piano man!

This is gonna be great.

All right.

These things are so much fun.

- Ready? Okay.

- Yep.

- No boring high school yearbook poses.

- What do you mean?

The whole point is to do

something different in every photo.

I'm smiling.

I know this might come as a shock to you,

Rate this script:(0.00 / 0 votes)