Welcome, or No Trespassing

Synopsis: A satirical comedy about the excessive restrictions that children face during their vacation in a Young Pioneer camp.
Genre: Comedy, Family
74 min

Dedicated to adults who once were kids

And to kids who will one day be adults



"No trespassing"


Semyon Lungin, Ilya Nusinov

Stage manager:

Elem Klimov

Chief operator:

Anatoliy Kuznetsov

V.Kamskiy, B.Blank


M.Tariverdiyev, I.Yakushenko




Special effects:

I.Felitsyn, Art: N.Zvonarev




N.Lozinskaya, N.Rudakova



Yevgeniy Yevstigneyev

A.Aleynikova, I.Rutberg,

L.Smirnova, A.Smirnov

"Learning is enlightenment"

V.Kosykh, Y.Bondarenko, L.Volkova, B.Demb, S.Kokorev, I.Kryukov, S.Tsarev, S.Mashovets, T.Prokhorova, L.Smeyan

T.Barysheva, A.Lagranskiy, I.Mazurova,

V.Uralskiy, N.Shatskaya, V.Burdukov

S.Zhiveynov, A.Miniovich, S.Shappu, S.Baikov

In mass scenes:

Pioneers from Moscow, Vorkuta, and Novo-Mikhailovsk schools

"Children are the masters of our camp."

- Third troop!

This is our swimming area.

And locals swim over there, on the island.

- Three... four... five...

This is Mitrofanova. She's on counting duty today.

This is our troop guide, Valya.

These are Stasik, Dimka, Venka, Lena, Nelya...

Our slippers...

Oh yeah, guess who is her uncle? Comrade Mitrofanov.

This is our gym teacher.

Whoops, not this one. This one, with the cucumber, is our supplies manager.

This is the gym teacher.

He goes to the university in the winter, but works camps in the summer.

We call him "Goose," but he doesn't seem to mind.

This is the doctor.

And this one is the camp director. Comrade Dynin.

- Twenty two...

- Twenty two!

- Twenty three...

- Twenty three!

- Twenty four...

- Twenty four!

- Twenty five... Tw...

- Twenty six!

- One, two, three, four...

- Boy! Hey, boy, get out of here!

These locals are spoiling our whole regime.

- Oh, relax, will you?

- I heard there were cases of whooping-cough in the village.

We must make sure our kids avoid all contact.

- Avoid any contact... contact... contact...

- Oh, dear, I shudder to think about the parents' day.

As if we didn't have enough trouble with locals.

Now we'll get some walking infections from the city.

- So what. It's all good!

- Why, why does he insist on this "parents' day?"

- They say Mitrofanov will be coming.

- Aaah.


- ...24 ...25.

- Put on your slippers! Everyone put on your slippers!

- What's the matter?

- Quick, everyone, hurry! Put them on!

- Whose slippers are these?

- Mine!

- Hey, who's missing?

- How should I know?

- He got away.

- Lost one.

- Inochkin!

- All together!

- Inochkin!

- Inochkin!

- Inochkin!

And that's me. That's my name -- Kostya Inochkin.

I ran away with the locals to the island. I'm a very good swimmer.

- You don't believe me?

All right, one moment.

I can swim across this river a hundred thousand times over!

I'll have you know, I do 2:12 on the back.

If I was a woman, I would be a state champion in women's swimming.

- When I was a little boy...

I, too, spent summers in camps.

We had it tough back then.

Had to sleep in makeshift shelters...

Cook on open fire.

Had to fetch our own water.

And do our own laundry.

In other words, none of the comforts of life whatsoever.

And now? Look around.

Look at those dorms you've got!

Look at all those lawns!



Gas cooking!

Greenhouses! Flower pots! Activities!


You are "masters of this camp."

You are!

What is required of you, my friends?

- Dis-cip-line!

- I expressly forbade swimming to the island.

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"Welcome, or No Trespassing" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 19 Sep. 2020. <https://www.scripts.com/script/welcome%2C_or_no_trespassing_7035>.

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