Wedding Daze

I Iove Iove

I Iove being in Iove

I don't care what it does to me

Sing I Iove Iove

I Iove being in Iove

I don't care what it does to me

I Iove Iove

I Iove being in Iove

I don't care what it does to me

These piIIs are fine to pass

the time 'tiI I find my new drug

We'II take our chances we'II Iast a month

We'II never speak again

How I Iove being in Iove

May I heIp you?

Huh? No.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

I'm just browsing.

- Thank you.

- So Iet me guess.

Big night tonight?

- Yeah.

- Yeah?

Yeah, actuaIIy. ActuaIIy, the biggest.

- ReaIIy?

- Yeah.

- Menage a trois?

- Pardon me?

I'm kidding.

Oh, a menage a trois.

French for, ''Who's that dude?''

So you're Iooking for

something for your girI?

WeII, not just any girI, okay?

The most. . .

The most beautifuI and incredibIe

and amazing and. . .

WeII, girI I've ever met.

Okay. WeII, if you have any

questions, my name is CIaire.

Okay. ActuaIIy, yeah.

Does this come in red?

- I can check.

- AIso, CIaire, does it come any Iarger?

Much, much Iarger.

Oh, no.

Hey. Is she in there?

- Yeah, she's in there.

- Good.

How do I Iook?

I see your baIIs.

Are you crazy?

Come here. Come here. Up here, up.

- What's the matter with you?

- What?

This? This is the big idea?

Yeah. Yeah. She's gonna Iove it.

- She's gonna hate it.

- She's gonna Iove it.

- No, she's gonna hate it.

- Love it.

No, she's gonna hate it more

than I hate it, and I reaIIy hate it.

You know what your probIem is, Ted?

You just. . .

You don't understand true Iove.

Oh, and you do?

I understand that there's a girI

that I Iove waiting for me in there.

And you know what? She Ioves me, too.

I stiII see baIIs.

Can I get you a drink whiIe

you wait for your friend?

HopefuIIy, in a man's Iife,

you do this one time.

WeII, I want my one

time to be unforgettabIe.

I want tonight to be a story Vanessa

and me wiII be teIIing our grandkids.

You aImost done with that baby oiI?

Yeah. That's it.

Get it in there. Soak those abs.

- I'm gonna kiII you.

- ( SIGHI NG ) Thanks, buddy.

- What's up, Iadies?

- Oh, goodness.

There you go, beautifuI.

I brought you some c-rations on the house.

Some what?

Oh, sorry. That's SpeciaI Forces taIk.

Are you in the SpeciaI Forces?

That's not something

I'm at Iiberty to discuss.

(EX CLAI MI NG )

Anderson, I seII cars.

My job is to cIose a deaI.

- Trust me. This is not gonna cIose a deaI.

- Give me the ring, Ted.

No. I can't Iet you do this.

- Give me the ring!

- No.

- Give me the ring, now!

- No.

Give me the ring!

Just give me the ring! I just want the ring!

I've got to propose!

Okay. Hey, watch the wings!

Watch the wings!

I'm not gonna Iie to you, Vanessa.

SpeciaI Ops,

it's a deadIy game.

But as a very brave

person once remarked,

''Life is either daring or it's nothing.''

Do you know who that brave person was?

My personaI hero, HeIen KeIIer.

HeIen KeIIer.

Excuse me, Vanessa.

I think tabIe 1 6 needs more garIic knots.

Ladies and gentIemen, may I

have your attention, pIease?

I am Cupid, god of Iove.

Dear God!

Shooter! Shooter! We got a shooter!

Down! Everybody, down!

Down! Down!

( GROANS )

( GRUNTI NG )

Anderson!

You know this perp?

He's my boyfriend.

I didn't know you had a boyfriend.

Anderson, get up! Get up!

You couId have gotten yourseIf kiIIed!

Vanessa, I . . .

I wrote you a poem.

(PEOPLE EX CLAI MI NG )

''I am Cupid, god of Iove

''I come from skies far above

''Bringing Iove to aII I see

''Now I have found some Iove for me''

Fag.

''And so I get on bended knee

''To ask, Vanessa, wiII you marry me?''

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