Walk of Shame

1

Right after the break, we're

going to interview David Kern,

who climbed the highest mountain

in the world, Mount Everest,

but he's gay.

I mean, he's gay.

Excuse me, he's blind.

- More teens are having f*ck...

- Having luck, rather.

One way to do a turkey call

is with this gobbler

that allows the air to vibrate.

You should try it.

I'd love to.

Go ahead, I want to see this.

No, no.

That just wasn't right.

Yeah.

It's a beautiful Memorial Day.

We have people

out here sunbathing.

We have people

tossing the ball around.

And we really want to

advise that you guys

try to make it

a safe Memorial Day.

I'm a bird, bitch!

Okay, dude.

God damn it, man!

Well, I'm sure

you needed it, Annie.

Did you get many

spankings as a kid?

Um... As a kid, no.

I... Wait.

Wait a minute.

Susenko Energy is announcing

a proposal to jack off...

Jack up. Excuse me.

What is your comment on the

results of the proceedings?

I have no comment.

How do you think

your case is affected...

What really happened on that

Thursday here at Central High

that led to Tim Johnson's...

What the f*ck was that?

Shit.

God, I'm dying in this fucking

country-ass, fucked-up town.

Here they come down the hill.

It looks like Reuben is in the

lead, and here he comes now...

An infestation of Canadian brown

finches, which is a small bird...

I guess I should have seen that one

coming, huh?

We now send it over

to Meghan Miles. Meghan?

Hey, Joe, I'm here

at the ASPCA, where on...

Oh, boy. I think she's

actually hurt there. Ooh.

I think she is.

Meghan, are you okay?

Okay, Meghan?

We'll get a medic over to her.

Yeah.

Thank you so much

for coming with me.

You're my girl. Team.

Right. Team.

Oh, my God. They're not going to

bring up the cat thing, right?

That was 100 years ago. No one looks

at those YouTube things anymore.

Yeah, right.

Relax, Meghan.

Relax.

Ooh. It's the network.

It's a big step up from

local, but you are ready.

Oh, I'm ready.

Just be yourself.

No, I'm going to be exactly

what they want me to be.

"Anchor."

It is both a noun and a verb.

A reliable or principal

support, but in action,

it means to hold fast.

Hmm.

I believe I can do

that for your viewers,

be the center,

and hold them,

steady.

Tell us more about yourself.

Well, I was raised in Texas.

I studied journalism

at the University of Texas.

I love to read.

I'm a voracious reader.

Mostly historical fiction.

Have you read

Toni Morrison's Beloved?

Of course.

- Good answer.

- Hmm.

My role models include my

parents, which I know is corny,

but they've been

married 35 years,

and I am recently engaged.

We like that.

We'll have a decision in two weeks.

There isn't any

dirt in your past that

we should know about?

Skeletons?

Bones of any kind?

I'm a good girl.

Morning, Meghan Miles.

Be well.

Good day. Good day.

Hey, looking good, Chuck Rogers.

Five minutes to air, people.

Hey.

Hey.

So, I just spoke to my

source inside the network.

And?

It's down to you and Wendy Chang.

The decision should come down today.

Don't be nervous.

Don't be nervous?

You shouldn't have told me.

Breathe.

Wow. Oh,

gosh, hang on, hang on.

This is Meghan Miles.

Meghan, you dirty hooker.

Rosie, stop.

I'm about to go on-air.

Okay, good. But be advised that we

are going out tonight to celebrate.

Honey, I didn't get the job yet.

Minor detail.

I don't know.

It's been a really long week.

Shh. Don't be a cockblocker.

Repeat after me,

"I will not block the cock."

You know what? Rosie, hang on. I have

another call. It could be the network.

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