
Tripping The Rift: The Movie
- NOT RATED
- Year:
- 2008
- 75 min
- 48 Views
Target area:
Target Level: NoneChode McBlob - Location Unknown
Jacket:
Material ID, 42556 Size: 38Thread level:
MinimalPants:
Material ID: 47 829Size 31, Unknown Substance
Suddenly, trolling those
dives for your birthday party
doesn't seem quite
so bad, Uncle Chode.
I have a bad feeling about this.
Yeah, black and white usually means
the fucking producers ran out of money.
She's talking about
this place, dumb ass!
Relax! You'll feel a whole lot better
once you get your
share of the money.
I can't believe how much
to be the royal princess'
bodyguard for just a weekend.
Thank God this job's
only for two days!
These local yokels
give me the creeps!
Nonsense.
They're probably just shy.
You just have to be the
one that's friendly first!
A pleasant good
evening to you, madam.
- F*ck off!
- That went well.
Hey, Uncle Chode,
you've seen the princess.
Is she beautiful and sweet and
innocent like in all the fairy tales?
Hier kommen sie the princess.
Lord,
let her be a hot little virgin
anxious to learn the
wicked ways of the world.
Damn, ho, baby!
Somebody's been
hitting the super size.
Well, let's just say they call
them fairy tales for a reason, kid.
Is it Halloween already?
Geez, you tell me.
You all look a little old
to be trick-or-treating.
We've been hired to
guard the princess.
In that case, let
me introduce myself.
- I'm...
- Don't tell me. Eyesore!
No! I don't know why everyone
thinks my name is Eyesore.
Maybe it's because you've got...
What?
Nothing.
Who is the inconsiderate bastard that's
bothering us at this time of the night?
They're here to
call the princess.
- Yeah. My name...
- Don't tell me. Swollen Hemorrhoid?
May I call you Swollen?
I'm Frau Schmidt.
I'm Her Highness'
lady in waiting.
Show them in!
Walk this way.
Too easy.
Sorry, but your cow will
have to go in the barn.
I beg your pardon!
I am sorry.
Your talking cow will
have to go in the barn!
I am not an animal!
Piss off, you murdering swine!
What? How dare you
talk to me like...
Who's out there?
What did you say?
Nothing!
La Cage aux Poofter
So I said to him,
"Dr. Richard Turner is so formal.
"Do you mind if I call you Dick?"
Give me your clothes!
You forgot to say
please, sweetie.
Okay, girls, time to close up.
all night again, you're...
big nuts.
I said give me your clothes!
Hey, girlfriend, we don't want any trouble.
Get going while the getting's good.
Primary Social Protocol
a.) Exterminate; b.) Ignore;
c.) Inflict wedgy
How would you like a wedgy?
Sounds like my old gym teacher.
I'm looking for Chode.
You just missed him. He was here
asking about renting the place.
The homophobic little bastard took
off when he realized it was a gay bar!
If I ever see you again,
I'll scratch your
eyes out, you bitch!
When I am king,
you will be Queen
Mother, Mother.
One minute!
One stinking minute!
What is it, woman?
threat on the life of the princess!
Let me see that note!
I hope that security teams that I
asked you to hire knows their stuff!
Yes. I got the best
bodyguards in the business.
They'd better be! If anything
were to happen to her,
our nation would
be without a leader!
We would find one somewhere.
Nonsense! There is no
one left of royal blood.
She is the last of
an ancient, noble line
that goes back
hundreds of years!
Ja, ja, ja!
Don't let the door hit you
on the ass on the way out!
Did you know Her
Highness' royal crown
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Citation
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"Tripping The Rift: The Movie" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 16 Jan. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/tripping_the_rift:_the_movie_22268>.