Trailer Park Boys: Countdown To Liquor Day

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That wasn't so bad!

Here I am...

Paradise.

I've got everything I want.

But it doesn't add up to shit.

'Cause I fell in love

with the wrong man.

Be careful who you love.

First thing I'm doing

when I get home.

I'm gonna rub some cat food

just on my cheeks like that.

Let all the kitties come up

and lick it off me.

There's no better feeling

than a little miniature

sandpaper-tongue kitty.

Well, they let everybody out,

you know, in 2 shifts.

There's a morning parole

and an afternoon parole.

I got morning parole. Thank God...

Ricky and Julian are getting out

this afternoon, hopefully,

if everything goes right.

Hi. My name's Julian.

Inmate number 212457.

Thank you for your time today.

Have a seat.

Name and prisoner number please?

You know who I fucking am.

And here's my goddamn number

right here.

Just read what they say right on me,

right here!

Well, Ricky, we've been--

Can you smoke in here?

This here's a certificate

for an auto body technician.

It's a course that I took in jail.

Good!

Let's get the f*ck going here,

get on with this and get me out.

'Cause I know

you're gonna let me out anyway.

It's 40 grand a year minimum

to fucking keep me here.

I've seen that on TV in jail.

It's overcrowded.

I didn't even do anything that bad.

Okay, sir. What I've put together

is a 4-year plan

for a business that I wanna open,

it's called Success Auto Body.

Yep.

And I plan on opening up

the business in my trailer,

that was given to me

by my grandmother...

and turn it into an auto body shop.

I didn't get any diploma yet,

but I'm gonna be getting the grade 12.

Once you have that,

you can pretty much do anything.

Myself. I've learned my lesson.

And the only way to succeed in life

is to be legitimate,

and to stay away from crime.

Your friend Julian has convinced us

that he will be a success...

All right, in his business.

Well, I'm gonna work for him,

so that makes me a success, so--

It doesn't automatically.

It's a long road to success, sir.

Sir, it's gonna be 100% legitimate.

I will be a taxpayer as of today

if you grant me with this release.

There's no chance you might

find a way to, say,

chop a few cars in your spare time?

No, sir.

What's the right answer here, guys?

I'm gonna go get a job

or go fucking grow some dope

and sell a bit of dope

and support my family that way--

Excuse me?

I can tell you whatever

you wanna hear or be honest.

I'll grow dope,

that's what I'm good at.

I grow the best dope of anyone

I've ever met.

I've been looking through

these papers here

and it mentions

a fellow named Jim Lahey.

Trailer Park superintendent.

There seems to be

some ongoing problems with...

you and him.

Is this going to continue

when you come out of prison?

No, absolutely not.

Can I have a cigarette then?

Take him back to his seat!

Why don't you ask Darren

how high he is?

Just one drag! F*ck off and let me

have a cigarette!

Give those back!

You left them out to tease me!

Come on!

Just one little drag...

I'm never gonna give up on success.

That is the only thing that's on my mind

right now.

I'm never coming back to jail.

And I'm going to be successful.

Let's make sure

we don't see you here again.

Well, I came in on the bus,

you know,

with this vision of Sunnyvale

in my head,

and I get off the bus

and I'm fucking stunned!

I mean, it's demolished,

the trailers are down...

the grass is growing up,

garbage everywhere.

Fucking dogs eating out

of old garbage bags and lickin' things.

This is disastrous!

So I immediately, you know,

I wanted to go to my shed,

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