Thicker Than Water

Synopsis: Oliver's in trouble with his wife after missing a payment on their furniture, having given the money to Stanley, who used it instead to pay Mrs. Hardy for his room and board. While doing the dishes, Stanley convinces Oliver to withdraw the family savings and buy the furniture outright. But they accidentally squander it at an auction, purchasing a grandfather clock which gets smashed on the way home. Mrs. Hardy's reaction sends Oliver to the hospital, where a blood transfusion from Stanley produces confusing results.
Genre: Comedy, Short
21 min

Are you going to eat your pie?

- Or can I...

- You've had two pieces of pie.

Incidentally, when are you going

to pay me for your board and room?

I gave it to him.

- Why?

- He said he was boss, now.

He did?

Don't get sore.

I was only kidding.

From now on, you only pay me.


We've got to be running along.

Come on Stanley.

- Bye, honey.

- Bye.

- Where do you think you're going?

- We're going to the ball game.

You're going to the ball game.

We businessmen have

to relax some time, don't we?

We certainly do.

If you want to relax, you can

stay home and wash these dishes.

- What do you mean "wash the dishes"?

- Yeah, what will his friends think?

You keep out of this.

You stay home.

Come on, the dishes.

- I'll be seeing you.

- No you don't!

If I have to stay and wash

the dishes, he's going to dry them.

I don't care who does what.

But you won't leave me

here washing the dishes alone.

After we get through,

can we go to the ball game?

You can do what you like.

Thank you, honey.

Mrs. Hardy.

Get me the dish pan.

Over there.

Get me the soap powder.

Don't forget to rinse them off.

Get out of the way.

Pull out that board.

Don't keep handing them to me.

When you get it dry,

put it in a nice dry place.

Now we're getting someplace.

You open the cupboard.

I'll put that away.

See who that is.

- Is Mr. Hardy home?

- Yes, but he's not in.

What's the matter with you.

Too lazy to answer the door?

- Good afternoon, Mr. Finlayson.

- Good afternoon.

- What's the idea?

- I'm collecting the furniture payment.

It was paid yesterday.

Steady, woman.

Not to me, it wasn't.

- Oliver!

- Yes, baby, I'm coming.

Oliver, there must be some mistake.

Did I or did I not give you

the money to pay on the furniture?

- You certainly did.

- Then why wasn't it paid?

I gave it to him to pay it for me.

- What did you do with it?

- I gave it back to him.

You gave it to me?

Yeah, I gave it to you

to pay my room and board.

Then you gave it to her.


You mean the money that he gave

to you that you gave to him

that he gave to me, was the same

money I gave to him to pay him?

If that was the money you gave him

to give me to pay to him

it must've been the money that I gave

him to give to you to pay my rent.

- Mr. Finlayson, I owe you an apology.

- And 37 dollars.

Then this money must belong to you.

Next time, I want my

payment without any detour.

He gave it to him and he gave it

to you and who give it to what.

You're all nuts!

You big dumb-bell.

I can't trust you to do a thing.

And as for you.

I've a good mind to throw you out.

- You can't do it.

- I can't do it!

No, because I paid my room

and board in advance.

And I gave it to him.

What do you mean

"you gave it to me"?

That was the money

that she gave to me

and I gave it to you to give to him

then you gave it back

to me and I had to give it to her

to give to him.

Was the the money that she gave

to him that I gave to you

- to give to...

- Certainly.

Well if she wants to give it

to him that's her business.

- No use you and I arguing about it.

- Cut it out!

What humiliation.

Creditors hounding me

at my very fire-side.

- You know what?

- What?

I've got an idea.

Let's hear it.

How much money have you

and your wife got in the bank?

Well, if it's any of your business,

we have a joint account

of 300 dollars. Why?

Why don't you draw the money out

of the bank

pay off the furniture

and own it outright?

You wouldn't have

any interest to pay.

And you wouldn't have any hounds

in your fireplace.

- That's a good idea.

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David Elver


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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Thicker Than Water" STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 15 May 2021. <>.

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