The Wild

So there I was,

face to face with the biggest,

meanest leopard on this side

of the Serengeti. And...

You roared so loud,

his spots flew clean off.

Dad, I've heard this

like a billion times.

Do you know the one where

I made the laughing hyenas...

Cry? Yep.

- The croc attack?

- Dad.

OK. Think.

Yeah, you do that.

All right, Mr. Smart Guy,

here's one I know you haven't heard.

It all started in the little place

I like to call...

...the wild.

They were the fastest wildebeests

on the savannah.

We're talking fast.

All the other lions

had given up the hunt hours ago,

except your old man.

Fortunately, I knew a short cut.

I thought I had 'em.

Until the dust cleared.

Classic wildebeest trap.

So, what did you do next?

- What did I do?

- Yeah.

That's when I gave them the roar.

- That's it?

- Hold on a sec.

I only thought it was over.

But they had a secret weapon.

He was the biggest wildebeest

I've ever seen.

- He was 14 feet tall!

- Fourteen?

I meant 1,401 feet tall!

Cool.

And he had two... No, four

of the biggest horns I'd ever seen.

- Whoa!

- His breath was red hot!

I mean, green.

And he hated the environment.

To pull this off, I knew I was

gonna have to dig deep,

deeper than I ever had before.

So I swallowed my fear,

sucked in the biggest breath I could.

Dad, I'm ready!

- You got it?

- I got it!

- I got it!

- Well, let him have it!

Roar, son!

Story of my life.

Your roar stops a herd of wildebeests.

Mine makes the babies laugh.

Hey, come on. That was much better.

I'm serious!

It dropped half an octave.

It dropped half an octave.

And it sure scared me.

- Made my hair stand up on end.

- Yeah, right, Dad.

- OK. Let's take it from the top.

- I'm done for today.

Come on, come on, one more.

You were so close.

Maybe it's something technical.

Maybe you're not opening your mouth

wide enough. Like this.

Dad, thanks for the technical help,

but if you wanted me to roar like you,

you'd take me to the wild.

Hold on a second. We've got

everything we could ever want here.

Great lifestyle, three squares a day.

- It's boring.

- Boring?

- I'll never learn how to roar here.

- Ryan.

But don't worry. I finally figured out

- how we can get to the wild.

- You did?

The pigeons say

those green boxes go there.

Those boxes are bad news. Stay away.

- But, Dad...

- I know you're frustrated,

- but a lion finds his roar...

- Here.

I'm so tired of hearing that, Dad!

It's a rat!

Get that rat off my baby!

A rat?

Hello!

Silly, silly rat.

- Rats do not got bling like this, lady.

- You little...!

Lastly, that is the ugliest baby

I've ever seen!

Benny, stealing candy from a baby?

Stealing is such a strong word.

I prefer "liberating."

Hey, kid, heard the roar.

Down another...

- Octave.

- Octave!

You ready to cheer me and your old man

as we capture our fifth straight

turtle-curling title?

I can't even roar.

How would you even know I'm there?

So, you really think

it dropped an octave?

Absolutely.

- What the heck is an octave?

- I heard that.

- Rabbit.

- Cholesterol. I'll stick with the nuts.

I don't know what his problem is, Benny.

He's 11, but he's still roaring

at a nine-year-old level.

Little help here, Sammy?

You know what?

Maybe you're setting the bar too high,

with all those stories

about Samson the Wild.

Hey, he's always loved those stories!

They inspire him.

OK. I'm not gonna argue with someone

who can use my tail as dental floss.

- You got something right there.

- Where?

- No, no, other side.

- Here?

- Sorry, Benny.

- You got it.

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