The Vow

Wow, it was barely

an inch when we went in.

It's so beautiful.

It's good,

it's good, it's good.

I can't feel my fingers.

Thank you.

... do anything for love

You do not like this song.

I would do anything for love

I would do anything for love

You have to turn it off.

But I won't do that

Oh, no, I won't...

I'm married to a cheeser!

Please, stop!

You love it.

Say you love it. Stop! Ow!

Stop it!

You love that song.

Oh, Leo.

Hey, I have this theory.

Mmm-hmm.

That a girl's guaranteed to get

preggers if she does it in a car.

What?

Mmm-hmm.

I have a theory, too.

My theory is about moments.

Moments of impact.

My theory is that

these moments of impact,

these flashes of high intensity

that completely turn

our lives upside down,

actually end up

defining who we are.

Thanks.

Next in line.

One of my absolute

favorite moments.

Oh!

You forgot your permit.

Yeah. Well, I just sort of come

here to enjoy the two-hour line.

The permit's sort of a bonus.

The Art Institute.

You work there?

No, I'm a student.

I'm Paige.

I'm sorry. I'm Leo.

Well, thank you for this, Leo.

You know what, I noticed, in a

totally non-threatening way,

we have the same RPP zone.

Is that right?

Yup.

Hmm.

You have impressive

powers of observation.

Yes.

What's an RPP zone?

Residential

permit parking zone.

Oh.

That sounds intimate.

Yeah.

Okay.

What I was thinking is that...

I think we owe it

to ourselves, really,

to maybe get a drink,

out of respect for our

zone compatibility and all.

Okay.

Okay?

Mmm-hmm.

All right, okay.

After you.

Pick a hand. Pick a hand.

Pick a hand.

That one.

Here we go.

Mmm.

Mmm.

This is good.

Of the water's waves

Still I know you're

in the darkness shining

When the sun

starts coming through

Or when the cardinal

chides the moon

Let me know if you

need anything else.

I believe in energies

That no one has to see

for us to prove

I believe in you and me

And everything

we'll ever see and do

Oh.

Oh.

Mmm.

Specks of gold

in the river running

From the deep moonlight

When the sun

starts coming through

Or when the cardinal

chides the moon

That no one has to see

for us to prove

The rain pours down

in a million rivers

Did you just fart?

No.

Oh.

Maybe a little.

That is so twisted.

But totally romantic.

God, I'm so in love

with you, it's insane.

As you know,

your wife's CTscan

showed

intracranial hemorrhaging.

We purposely keep patients

with traumatic brain injuries

in a comatose state in order

to calm their systems

and allow the brain time to heal

itself while the swelling subsides.

And then we slowly

wean them off it. Now...

The thing is, each one

of us is the sum total of

every moment that

we've ever experienced,

with all the people

we've ever known.

And it's these moments

that become our history.

Like our own personal greatest

hits of memories that we play

and replay in our minds

over and over again.

Aren't you hungry?

Hey.

Hi.

What you doing?

Nothing.

Really?

No.

What's that?

Nothing.

Oh, nothing?

Food's ready.

Look, if you keep

feeding that fleabag,

it's gonna keep coming

back and I'm allergic.

Like you claim to be

allergic to cilantro?

I can't stand cilantro.

Exactly.

But you're not allergic.

Does anybody want strawberries I

bought at the farmers' market?

Buying groceries, bad sign.

What?

And we all know

what that means.

I like her.

She's like our mascot.

Thanks, I think.

I would rather have her than that

ferret you tried to make us adopt.

And she makes great coffee.

Let's keep her.

Thank you.

- Have some.

- Thank you.

"Movie"? I think you

spelled "movie" wrong.

No.

Told you.

Yes.

Mmm-hmm.

I vow to help you love life,

to always hold you

with tenderness,

and to have the patience

that love demands.

To speak when words are needed

and to share the silence

when they're not.

To agree to disagree

on red velvet cake.

And to live within

the warmth of your heart

and always call it home.

Wow, you set the bar

kind of high.

Did you write

your vows on a menu?

Yeah. Why?

I vow to fiercely love you

in all your forms,

now and forever.

I promise to never forget that

this is a once-in-a-lifetime love.

And to always know in the

deepest part of my soul

that no matter what challenges

might carry us apart,

that we'll always find the

way back to each other.

Do you take each other

as spouses forever?

I do.

I do.

Then by the power vested in me

by the State of Illinois, I...

Security.

I now pronounce you man and

wife and best friends for life.

Kiss! Run!

You had to run

for the weekend

And you had nowhere to be

You had enough of the sorrow

And it was all on TV

You blew a kiss

to a goodbye and

That's how you met me

Oh, it's ours

Oh, it's ours

Oh, it's ours

Oh, it's ours

I have one piece.

One piece.

It's...

It's not happening.

I don't...

Oh, my God.

You're gonna be fine.

Oh, my God. I'm gonna

have to call them.

I'm gonna have to call them

and tell them

that I can't do it.

Come to bed with me.

Come on. I know you wanna

come to bed with me.

Don't!

Oh, no, please, no.

Stop it!

Okay, okay, okay.

I think this one's

coming along fine.

I mean,

I know it's not finished,

but I'm already starting

to see a mood.

It's got like a darkening

curtain thing happening there,

and then a competing

light element, there.

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