The Love Section
- NOT RATED
- Year:
- 2013
- 100 min
- 27 Views
(SPANISH MUSIC PLAYING)
It's Cinco de Mayo
out there.
(WHISPERING)
Are you up?
Hey, Lisa, uh, I just wantd
to say...
The name's Angela, by the way.
I know I...
Shh.
It is quiet time, playboy.
You just don't forget
to call me, okay?
Let yourself out.
Yes, we're scheduled to close
escrow on Friday, Mr. Baker.
Great, so I'll see you on
Thursday for the walk-through.
Okay, talk to you soon. Bye.
Me-lo-dy!
Hey, Joel, what's up?
Hola, Senor.
You got my text message, huh?
I don't know how
she sleeps at night.
(IN SPANISH ACCENT)
Tell me a little bit more
about this Angela.
Wow! It was incredible, Joel.
One of the more fascinating
evenings of my young life.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Did you just
say fascinating?
Yes, sir.
Yo, man, I gotta hear
about this, man.
Tell me what happened.
Well, first we went out
for dinner and then she
invited me to her place.
And I gotta tell you,
she did some things
that I did not think
a woman could do.
Potential side chick?
Oh, yes, sir.
(WOMAN MOANING)
Sorry about that, dog.
Joel, you really need
to do something about
that porn, bro.
No, no, no.
I beg to differ, bro.
Porno is one
of the main reasons that
I'm happily married today.
(LAUGHS)
I mean, you know me, man,
I love my wife,
but you need balance.
(LAUGHS)
All right, I'll tell you.
You the man.
Listen, man,
you are never
gonna be able
to settle down
if you don't start
beating off!
(ALI LAUGHS)
Look, Joel, I gotta go.
Wait, wait, hold on.
Just hear me out, man.
I mean, you have to be in tune
with your inner self, man.
I mean, beating off
is like a art.
You know what I mean,
like Picasso, Rembrandt?
You know the dude who used
the paint the paintings
on Good Times?
Listen, it ain't just abt
pulling your skin back, .
You gotta find a zone,
a rhythm. You gotta get in
there, you gotta stay there.
You know what I'm saying,
just gotta ride,
gotta ride the rhythm.
You know what I mean?
(ALI LAUGHS)
Laugh
if you want to.
I gotta go, all right?
You're killing me.
I will see you tonight.
All right, man. Hey!
Jack it.
(SIGHS)
JOEL:
Oh, boy! Oh, boy!I see my man over there,
looking like the Unabomb.
Looking like kill someboy
at any minute. Nice shir.
Where they do that at?
Y'all look good.
Y'all look good.
Oh, boy!
Yo, where are my Mexican
brothers and sisters at?
Hola!
Hola, mami! Aye yai yai!
Yo! I got a question.
What's up with all
the loud talking?
Yo, my neighbor, Jose,
this dude, is like
my personal alarm clock.
Like every morning 6:00...
Oh, yeah?
I was just telling
Joel about that earlier.
(MIMICKING IN SPANISH)
It's ridiculous, you know?
Salud!
Salud to you, too,
mami, esta bonita!
You need agrande papi,
I'll do it.
Hey, yo, but I'm gonna me
this show on.
Coming up next is
a very good friend of mi,
very funny. He's
from Oakland, California.
My man Pee Wee!
Show some love
for my main man, Joel!
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
Joel in the house!
So, I'm Pee Wee,
show me some love!
Pee Wee in the house,
you know how it is.
Ladies, ladies,
Pee Wee's in the house!
Yo, who's married
in the house? Anybody married
or got their old lady?
I tell my old lady,
see, like,
I'm a morning sex person.
I like to do mine
in the morning!
Now, morning people,
make some noise.
That's what I'm talking about!
See, I like to do it
in the morning.
So, one morning,
I'm waking up...
Uh-oh. Joel's night-vision
is on point, bro.
PEE WEE:
Get off me.What do you mean
"get off you"?
Oh, man. That's Steph.
(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)
Steph. Old Steph,
with the titties!
Steph, who?
She looks
pretty hot to me.
You know what it is!
Like, oh, I see how it g.
I need to see what
her friend is talking about,
so, you gotta take one
for the team.
Ahh! Ali, man.
I said,
"Well, let me ask you th.
"Do you have a dentist's
appointment this morning"
(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)
Ah!
Y'all know what
I'm talking about.
Show Pee Wee some love!
That's what I'm talking about!
So listen, y'all,
that's about time.
I'm Pee Wee
from the Oak Town!
Show me some love,
I'm up outta here.
Thank you, thank you
and good night!
Yo, give it up again
for my man Pee Wee!
Yo, this next comic
coming to the stage,
is a very funny man.
He's performed everywhere.
Give it up for my man
J.J. Johnson!
(APPLAUSE)
Oh, sh*t!
J.J.:
Hey, how y'all doing?His name is Chris. I thought
his ass was on cocaine,
'cause he keeps sniffing up
his damn nose!
Chris? You never told me
about no Chris.
'Cause it didn't
last long, girl.
What's he do?
He a lawyer.
A lawyer? A lawyer?
Girl, are you crazy?
A cheap-ass lawyer, honey.
Oh!
(APPLAUSE)
Yo, give it up again
for my man, J.J. Johnson!
Yo! So I wanna thank y'all
your giggle on at Giggles.
We're gonna do it
the same time next week.
Until then,
peace and love!
Ha, ha, ha!
What up? What up?
Yo!
Next week, new material.
I did new material.
Yo, Steph!
Funny seeing you here.
Oh, my God! Chris,
what a surprise!
Good to see you.
All right,
well it's been good.
Right. Okay.
Hey, Steph,
this is my friend Ali.
Ali, Stephenie. Your friend?
Hi. This is Sandrine.
Nice to meet you.
Hi, nice to meet you.
What y'all about to do?
About to get some food.
All right, it's good
to see you. All right.
Great. Good to see you.
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
We would like to
treat you two ladies
to a late night meal.
Look, last week,
it was my girlfriend.
This week, I did it
with my wife.
It's like a
different dynamics.
Right?
Chris treating? Word?
Word! Who knew?
And it happens
all the time.
Okay, all right.
Well, it was nice
to meet you.
It's been real. Okay.
Bring your ass...
Come to the diner.
New material, man.
Just make me look good.
Okay, okay, man. You know,
I'll do my fiancee next week.
All right, man.
All right.
Ahem.
I guess, uh, I'm the
third wheel, huh?
Sandrine,
this my
good friend, Joel.
Hi, nice
to meet you.
Pleasure is all mine.
So, you enjoy
the show?
I did. You are
a very funny host.
You said,
what you say? What?
You are a
very funny host.
Oh, well,
thank you
very kindly.
And you be sure
to come back
now, you hear?
Okay, cowboy.
Well, I can see y'all
all up in
the love section,
so, I'm gonna go ahead
and head home because
I love my wife.
Okay.
For sure! Make sure you do it
before Judge Mathis, man.
You know how we do!
That's funny,
The love section.
That's cute.
So are you.
Thank you.
No, see,
that's not right.
It's not a Don Juan
pick-up line.
It sounds like it.
STEPH:
What is it?You sure
you're not pimping?
STEPH:
What about you? In thecomedy club recruiting?
Right.
Ah, see you guys
are funny.
No, all I'm saying
is it's a figure of speech.
STEPH:
Mmm-hmm.Like, life is good.
Seriously?
Like seriously, Chris!
Why? Why? Why?
You digging up your nose
and we trying to eat.
Correction, I'm simply
grooming my nose hairs.
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"The Love Section" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 2 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_love_section_12959>.
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