The Haunted Mansion

Synopsis: Married realtors Jim and Sara with their children go to Gracey Manor and Mr. Gracey is enamored with Sara and they discover that Sara looks like Mr. Gracey's old girlfriend, Elizabeth, who died young and they think it was a suicide but discover something more sinister.
Director(s): Rob Minkoff
Production: Buena Vista Pictures
  1 win & 4 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.0
Metacritic:
34
Rotten Tomatoes:
13%
PG
Year:
2003
88 min
$75,759,571
Website
4,615 Views


Aah!

It's love, isn't it?

Sometimes you walk into a house

and you take one look around,|and you know.

And you say, "This is for me. "

Oh, I think it's perfect.

It's just what|we've been looking for.

There aren't enough plugs.

Hey, wait, Mr. Coleman, now.

That place I showed you|on Sycamore Street

was absolutely,|positively loaded with plugs.

That's right.|There were plenty.

But the steps were too high.

When we get older,|we could trip.

Every house we look at|you find something to pick at.

I just know what I like.

Would you like a divorce?|'Cause I'll bring it.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.|No need for that.

I'm gonna find|this house for you.

I am committed to finding|the perfect house for you.

I don't care how long it takes.

Because at Evers & Evers,

we want you to be happy|forevers and evers.

Oh, excuse me one second.|Let me take this call.

Sorry.|I'm so sorry.

Hello. Evers & Evers|Real Estate. Jim Evers.

Hey, honey. How's it going?|Do they like the house?

Yes, this house is|still available.

Oh, I knew it.

I told you they were|lookie-lous.

It's another interested party.

Listen, I'm on my way home|to get ready for dinner.

I'm looking forward to tonight.

Well, are you preapproved?

Yeah, the reservation's at 7:00,|so don't be late.

Okay.|Well, 7:
00 is perfect.

Let's get together at 7:00,|and we'll go over your offer.

Okay, honey.|I'll see you later.

See what you did?

We love the house.

We do.|We love it.

Well, then, Mrs. Coleman.

Taking that into consideration,

there's only one thing|left to do.

Let's sign some papers.

- Hey.|- Hey.

Lorraine and Gary.

Just like I promised,|here's the offer.

Signed, sealed, and delivered.

Thank you.|Thank you so much.

We are so grateful.

This is a cause for celebration.|Let us buy you a drink.

Oh, no, really, I can't.|My wife's waiting for me.

This is such a big deal for us.|We have to celebrate.

- I really can't. I'm late.|- We insist.

Please.

Okay. One quick drink.|Okay. One quick one.

Sir, can I have a ginger ale|over here, please?

Oh, no.|That's not a drink.

Sammy, three Volcanoes.

- Oh, no. No volcanoes.|- They're incredibly smooth.

Oh, we love it here.

We've been coming here|for years.

- It's like Hawaii.|- Yes.

We spent our honeymoon there.

It was fantastic.|Have you been?

- No, never been there.|- Promise me you'll go.

Promise.

I'll go if you sign.|I will go to Hawaii if you sign.

But I got to get going because|it's my anniversary tonight.

Your anniversary?|Happy anniversary!

Thank you.|Sign that thing here.

# Happy anniversary #

# Happy anniversary,|happy anniversary #

# Happy anniversary #

# Happy, happy, happy, happy #

Hey, sign this!

Okay, Jim.

- Sorry about that.|- No.

It's been a pleasure|doing business with you. Aloha.

Okay.|Bye-bye.

Oh, excuse me.|Did I hear you correctly?

Did you just sell their house?

I sure did.

'Cause we're looking to buy.

Honey, forgive me.

Well, I'm Jim Evers|of Evers & Evers Real Estate.

Tell me about your dream house.

Hi, Sara.|My name's Teddy.

Your husband told me to tell you|he loves you very much,

but sometimes he loses track|of the time.

I'm sorry I'm late.

Happy anniversary.

Happy anniversary.

Yes.

Look at what he brought you.

Look at that.|Isn't that pretty?

Oh, you know, you have|a wonderful husband

that thinks about you like that|on your anniversaries.

You're so fortunate!

It's beautiful.

It's actually Teddy's fault|that I'm late.

He had a little accident|in the backseat,

cotton all over the place,|but I cleaned it up.

It's okay.|I forgive Teddy.

Hey, come on, Sara.|Don't be like that.

I'm on a roll here.|We sold seven houses this month.

What about|the three soccer games,

two birthday parties,|and barbecue you missed?

Did I miss that much stuff|this month?

Okay. We're gonna take off|this weekend.

What?

We're gonna take off|and go down to the lake

like we did last year with|the kids for the whole weekend.

- How's that sound?|- Can we really close on this?

Yes. How about this?|We can close on this.

How about this?

Close on that.|Let me go tell the kids.

All right?|Okay. All right.

Megan and Michael,|big family adventure!

Hey!|Michael Jordan Evers!

Aah! Aah!

Hey!|Whoa, whoa, whoa!

- Dad! There's a...|- What is it?

- There's a spider in my room!|- There's a what?

There's a spider in my room|on the window.

Why don't you kill it, man?

That's a big spider!

Come on.|It's just a spider, Michael.

How big could it be?|What is this?

Where's the spider at?

What? Man, you're acting|like it's Mothra.

It's just a spider.

You're making a big deal|out of nothing, Michael.

You're 10 years old.

It's time I teach you how to|kill a spider the right way.

The most efficient way|to crush a spider.

You got to get a good magazine.|Doesn't matter what you use.

Some people like to use "Life"|or "Time" or...

This is my "Sports lllustrated"|Swimsuit Edition.

What are you doing with it?

- I don't know.|- Yeah, right.

If you can look at this,|you should have enough courage

to kill a spider the right way.

So I'm gonna roll this up|so you get a good grip on it.

You get a bead on the spider.|You get a side swing.

That's where you can really get|some good action going.

You want to come across like|that so you really crush it.

You come across this way so|you get his whole escape route

in case he try to go...

You take it, and you whack it.

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David Berenbaum

David Berenbaum is an American screenwriter whose credits include the films Elf, The Haunted Mansion, Zoom, The Spiderwick Chronicles, and Strange Magic. more…

All David Berenbaum scripts | David Berenbaum Scripts

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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