The Fan
- Year:
- 1949
- 89 min
- 131 Views
I'm offered two and six
for this handsome trophy.
Do I hear another bid?
It's going for two and six
to the party in the checkered scarf.
Next, lot 177.
What have we here?
One mother-of-pearl box, inlaid,
containing a fan.
Here's a beauty for you!
Regency period, Alenon lace
mounted on carved ivory sticks.
Absolutely perfect condition.
You'd never know that Jerry
had dropped his filthy bombs near it.
What's the bid
for this veritable treasure?
Wallington Limited.
There it is, right there.
The stamp of one of
England's most refined jewelers.
Think of a noble lady, all done up
in her silks and her settings
that must have held this in her delicate
hands
or waved it at her noble Lord.
Oh, here's a name on it. Margaret.
Now there's a real lady's name for you.
Come up, come up.
Don't be frightened of the aristocracy.
This here is more
than an object of beauty.
It's genuine necessity, it's what
every English home needs this winter.
Something to set up a nice cool breeze.
- Twelve shillings.
- Fifteen.
Eighteen.
Eighteen shillings?
I'm an auctioneer, not Father Christmas.
Who will give a proper bid?
- Young man.
- How much, madam?
I have no intention of bidding.
Why should I?
It's my own fan.
Madam, this here is a piece
of unclaimed property
salvaged from blitz buildings
to be publicly sold.
Well, it isn't any more
because I'm claiming it now.
You should have thought
of that sooner.
These lots have been on view
for the past month.
Come on,
I made a bid of 18 shillings.
All right, 18 shillings for the gentleman
with the big heart.
Do I hear a pound?
What are you talking about?
The fan is mine.
You really can't stand there selling things
that don't belong to you.
How do I know the fan is yours?
Well, I... I told you so.
- Oh, come off it, madam.
- I shall be delighted to have it back.
It's been stored at Edwards's for years
while I've been travelling.
That's right, you know.
There was a direct hit on Edwards's.
Come on, we haven't got all day.
Madam, can you furnish
any proof of ownership?
- Have you got a bill for this fan?
- Of course not, it was a gift.
You'll find me always cheerful
and willing to oblige.
I'll put the fan aside for a day.
If you bring in someone who knows you
and knows it's yours, you can have it.
That's quite absurd. Everyone I once
knew in London must be dead by now.
Sorry, madam, but you must find
someone to establish proof.
Madam, would you fill in this form,
please? That is the law.
I'm sure it is -
it's quite inconvenient enough to be.
Next...
Would you be good enough to tell me,
is Lord Darlington still alive?
- He sure is.
- Oh, you're an American.
I spent many years
in your stimulating country.
I get along very well with Americans.
After you've married one or two of them,
they don't seem like foreigners at all.
- Does Lord Darlington live here?
- Oh yes, we all do.
Oh, how picturesque.
This is the drawing room.
There is the dining room.
There's the chandelier.
And there is the painting
over the fireplace.
And you, young ladies,
you are perhaps, um...
descendants?
I hadn't known that Lord Darlington
had ever visited America.
Oh no, we just rent our rooms here.
Oh, forgive me.
I've been away for so long.
Lord Darlington letting lodgings.
Don't you know
there's a housing shortage?
This is an office now.
And just what office is this?
We work for an organization in the
States that sends food to people here.
I knew you were nice girls
the moment I laid eyes on you.
And does Lord Darlington
have an office here too?
Oh no, his rooms are
the way they always were.
Poor old guy, how could he live
any other way? He's a museum piece.
A museum piece?
My dears, Lord Darlington was once
the most dangerous man in London.
- Is he at home now?
- He never goes out before three.
Do you want to see him?
- Yes, please.
- Sure.
Oh, who shall I say?
- Just tell him a very dear old enemy.
- Okay.
- Hi, sweet.
- Good afternoon, my dear.
You're looking like a...
No, not at all like a rose.
You're looking like
an extremely healthy sunflower.
You know what? There's a lady
waiting downstairs to see you.
- Indeed? What is her name?
- She said she was a dear old enemy.
Extraordinary,
I didn't know I had any of them left.
Hope she doesn't keep me too long.
Enemies' conversations
are interminable -
friends get it over in a minute.
This is the hour for my walk.
Here's your little gloves.
Here's your little cane.
Here's your little hat.
My dear, somehow I believe
my accessories are the normal size.
- There. Are you okay now?
- I'm quite, as you say, okay.
Why, it is Lord Darlington!
Don't you remember me, Robert?
You must forgive me, madam,
but I have such a wretched memory.
Of course. At our age
we remember only ourselves.
But, don't you? Can't you?
Please make me young again
by telling me your name.
Hey Cynthia, have you got what came
down from Liverpool this morning?
You cannot expect me to refresh
my memory in this mad house,
- so if you will pardon me...
- Pardon you?
I'll do much better than that.
I'll accompany you.
Of course it was my vanity that
made me think you'd recognize me today
when yesterday was so very long ago.
Madam, I regret that
I'm contributing very little to the situation
and I'm pressed for time
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"The Fan" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 17 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_fan_20194>.
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