The Crew

Synopsis: Four former made men, struggling to get by in a rundown Miami hotel, come up with a plot to drive out all of the young tenants that are slowly taking over the beach-front hotel and driving up their rent. Taking a man that was found dead on the beach, they arrange what appears to a mob hit and provide a note that says more killings are to occur. Unfortunately the old man they use turns out to be the senile father of a drug lord. The drug lord declares war on the killers of his father, thinking it was an action of his enemies. A stripper learns of the old men's involvement and threatens to squeal on them unless they kill her stepmother. Meanwhile, one man searches for his long-lost daughter, who is the investigating police officer, trying to divest herself from her crumb fellow officer and former boyfriend.
Genre: Comedy, Crime
Director(s): Michael Dinner
Production: Touchstone Pictures
  1 win.
Rotten Tomatoes:
88 min

-All the boys want to do it.

-Youre kidding me.

Think aboutit.

Well think about it, a long time.

Im done. how about you guys?

What is so wrong about a union?

What did I say?

Brick, youre a lock, as usual,

for the Dumb-Ass-of-the-Year Award.

-And a union is such a bad idea?

-No. Run that by Nicky Black.


Tell him we want paid sick days,

two weeks vacation and...

...time-and-a-half if we whack someone

after regular business hours.

Dont bust my balls.

And dental. Right, Mouth?

Yeah, dental. Absolutely.

Definitely gotta have a good dental plan.

Nickyll kick your teeth in and say,

Theres your frigging dental plan.

Forget about it. I was just talking.

-What the--

-Pull over. Pull over.

All right.

Jimmy Whistles. You readu to talk now?

Wheres the truck gonna be?

The Pylaski Skuway, Exit 77.


Get him out of here.

Jimmy, you need to lau off

the meatball sandwiches.

Let him walk home.

hey, any of you guys working for Calabrisi

interested in unionising?

What the hell?

We were friends

for as long as I can remember.

From the time we were kids, the only thing

we ever really wanted to do...

...was become wise guys

and be part of the same crew.

Sometimes dreams come true.

Time for work.

Lets punch in.

This is Truck 3. Ive an abandoned

truck here that seems to be--

hey, pal.

Joey Pistella.

hows it going?

Nobody messed with Joeu.

Back when we was kids in Weehawken,

the coach wouldntlet Joeu be pitcher.

You throw like a girl. You stink.

I throw like a girl.

Do I hit like a girl, too, Coach?

Do l?

Everyone called Joeu Bats.

Enough said.


Describe what we look like.

Youre two fat Puerto Ricans.

Mike Donatelli.

We called him The Brick.

You hear what the hell he called us?

Sweet guy.

About 10 Luckyes short of a pack.

There was Tonu Donato. Chicks dug him.

Really thought that he was hot.

Ironic considering...

...he was one of the best arsonists

in the Triborough area.


hey, Mouth, hows it going?


We all called Tony Mouth

because he neversaid much of nothing.


That would be like Mouth

at his most talkative.

hey, Bobby.

Its going to be a good Christmas.

Yeah, bet your sweet ass.

And there was me, Bobby Bartellemeo.

I never had a nickname thatstuck.

Some guys, awhile back,

on account of my mother being Jewish....

hey, Paul. Its Bobby The Jew.

Bobby The Jew.

I thought that was disrespectful.


So The Jew thing never really caught on.

here you go, Bobby.

Thanks, Louie.

-Drinks for everybody?

-Yeah, drinks.

Being part of a crew was beautiful all right.

Money, power, respect. We had it all.

Life was for the taking,

and we took it, babu.

Why live any other way?

All right, our crew. Good guys...

...good times.

And those good times,

they were going to last forever.

Who said that good times

would last forever?

I thought wed be dead by now.

The union doesnt seem so stupid now,

does it?

Miami Beach. Used to be

the average age around here was like 82.

Then that broad, Madonna,

decides that this is the place to be.

Next thing you know, everywhere

you turn, its women with big breasts...

...and men with big breasts.

Breasts are very big here.

Excuse me.

hi. Do you live here?

Define live.

Were looking for an apartment

down here at the beach--

We were wondering if anyone

with an ocean view has died here...



If you two would like to hang out,

you could be the first to catch the smell.

Get out of here.


Get the hell out of here.

-Listen, Pops--


You listen.

I squeeze this ball four hours every day.

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Barry Fanaro

Barry Fanaro is an American screenwriter of television and feature films. He has taught screenwriting seminars at USC, UCSB, AFI and Mercer University. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "The Crew" STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 7 Dec. 2021. <>.

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