That's Not Me

Synopsis: Polly's dreams of making it as an actor are shattered when her twin sister catapults to international stardom. Scrambling to catch up - Polly juggles woeful auditions, painfully awkward dates and her underwhelming job at the local cinema.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Gregory Erdstein
Production: Moccasin
  3 nominations.
Rotten Tomatoes:
85 min

(upbeat electro

pop music)

(audience applause)

Wow, I feel so

incredibly special.

I don't even know where

to start, if you told me

five years ago I'd be standing

up here, winning an Oscar?

I mean, this is


I genuinely didn't

expect this and I haven't

even prepared anything.

There are so many incredible,

inspiring people that

have contributed to this.

I wanna say a huge thank you

to my parents, Mom and Dad,

you encouraged something

in me that I might not

have discovered


(exhales) Oh, I really

didn't wanna be one of those

people, and I'm sure they're

gonna start playing that

music any second now, so, I

wanna thank the entire cast

and crew, this belongs to

you as much as it does me,

but I'm gonna take

it home. (laughs)

Meryl, you're the

reason I started acting

in the first place.

Cate, our Cate,

what can I say?

But I wanna dedicate this

award to my twin sister, Amy,

who's actually

also an actor.

Ames, I know this industry

can be tough, trust me.

But if you keep at it,


if you keep at it,

aw, f*ck.

Excuse me, do you stock that

organic brand of tampons?

I think the packing

is green, or purple...

Yeah, yeah,

we should do.

I'm sorry, but aren't you that

girl from the KFC commercial?

No, sorry.

Yes you are, what

the KFC, dude? (laughs)

That's not the line,

no, it's actually

my twin sister, Amy.

Your twin sister?

Yeah, it's funny, I'm actually

an actor too, but I don't

really do commercials.


I've actually got a callback for

this HBO show with Jared Leto.

I'm kind of running late for

a meeting with my agent.


These ones?

Super, thank you.

You know, you don't have

to pretend that you've

got a twin sister.

I wasn't gonna ask you for

your autograph, or anything.

No seriously,

that's my sister, Amy.

It's just a KFC commercial,

most people wouldn't

even recognize you.

(Scoffs) I'm

not making it up.

I can call her right now.

Okay, go on.


Thanks for your help.

Good news, Polly darling,

your dry spell is over.

Summer Street want you

for a six-week guestie.

You're kidding?

I didn't even

do an audition.

They specifically

asked for you.

Far out.

Did they see me

in The Crucible?

Oh, aren't

you gorgeous?

No, they more or less cast

you from your head shot.

My head shot?

Yeah, so your character is

somewhat albino, you'll be

wearing red contact lenses,

maybe go a bit blonder,

stay out of the sun, is...

I'm sorry, albino?

Albee-no, albino, yes.

It's actually

quite a meaty role.

Don't you think

it's a bit offensive?


To actual

albino people.

How so?

Well, I'm sure there's actual

albino actors out there,

and I'd be taking

work away from them.

You're joking, right?

It's like blacking up.

Blacking up?

Would you rather albinos weren't

represented on TV at all?

You'd be giving

them a voice.

Look, I just don't wanna

be known as that albino

actor when I'm

not an albino.

Don't you think that's a

bit offensive to albinos?

Look, I'm just not comfortable

with it, and Cate Blanchett

never had to white up for

Summer Street, so why should I?

No, she was too busy doing

Tim Tam commercials.

Honestly Polly, I don't

know why I bother with you

sometimes, your sister is

nowhere near this difficult

to deal with.

Well, give it

to her then.

I don't really wanna

do soap operas anyway.

I wanna save myself for that

HBO thing with Jared Leto,

have you heard

about the callback?

I haven't, but I'll

let you know when I do.

I do want the

work, Trish.

I just wanna make sure I'm

Rate this script:(0.00 / 0 votes)

Gregory Erdstein

Gregory Erdstein is an Australian film director and writer. more…

All Gregory Erdstein scripts | Gregory Erdstein Scripts

FAVORITE (0 fans)

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:



    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)


    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:


    "That's Not Me" STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 9 Mar. 2021. <'s_not_me_19607>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    That's Not Me

    The Marketplace:

    Sell your Script !

    Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web!

    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.

    Thanks for your vote! We truly appreciate your support.