Swearnet: The Movie

Synopsis: Fed up with being censored in their post-Trailer Park Boys lives, the out of work stars/world-renowned 'swearists', Mike Smith, Robb Wells and John Paul Tremblay decide to start their own uncensored network on the internet.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Warren P. Sonoda
Production: Dada Films
  1 win.
Rotten Tomatoes:
112 min

You clip it, point,

and straight up,

You stupid quiff.

It was straight up,

you fuckhead,

Just like my cock

for your slutty mom.

Holy f***,

it's the trailer park boys!

Are you guys gonna get the show

goin' again this year?

No, actually, we have two brand

new shows we're shootin'.

Well, hopefully.

Oh, you f***in' sharp

little f***in' slut!

F*** you!

I see anger management's

workin' like a charm, Smith.

I quit f***in'

anger management!


that f***in' counsellor

Was makin' me nuts,

that cocksucker!

Hey, boys, how you doin'?

Hey, Johnny,

how's it goin'?

- Hey, Johnny.

- Oh, it's great to see ya.

Hey, Johnny,

how you doin', man?

Oh, man, it's great to have

you on the show.

The fans are still

so fascinated

With "trailer park boys",

you have no idea!

We're here to talk

about new sh*t.

Yeah, right.

They're swoopin' in.

They're comin' for you,



hey, do the voice, bubbles,

do the voice!

You're not

Jim Lahey anymore.

Yeah, I know,

I'm just f***in' with you.

Come on, boys,

We're gonna talk

about all your new sh*t.

All right, let's just get

this goin', John.

Robb and I are gonna

hit the racetrack

First thing in the morning,


Oh, yeah, right, um...

look, I read the story

about you and your old man.

Sorry for your loss, JP.

Yeah, it f***in' sucks,

you know.

He was trying to hang

on long enough

To do one more rally with me,

and he just couldn't make it.

Cancer can go f*** itself,


Oh, uh, hey, Robb,

Do you mind

if I tell everyone

That you're workin'

for a cigarette company?

The fan's will love

the Ricky connection.

John, we can't f***in' talk

about "trailer park boys".

We're not allowed.

No "trail park boys"

sh*t on the air.

Hey, no problem.

Welcome to "on the rocks"!

I'm your host,

John Dunsworth.

Today we have some

very special guests

Who need no introduction.

Mike Smith, John Paul Tremblay,

Robb Wells!

Ricky, Julian and bubbles

from the "trailer park boys"!

The f*** are you-?

We just f***in' talked

about this.

I know, I know,

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Listen, I hear you guys are

workin' on some new projects.

I hear they're great.

Well, that's what we're here

to talk about.

We're really excited

to be movin' on,

Doin' something different.

It's great.

The big question

on everyone's mind,

Including mine, is, uh,

Do you think we'll ever

do any more episodes

Of the "trailer park boys"?

- Holy, f***.

- F*** this.

F*** this, John!

Hey, hey, Mike,

have a sense of humour. Ricky?

We can't do this. We're not

allowed. We said that.

Hey, hey, Ricky!

- Nice goin', John.

- Yeah.

F***in' tree!

Faster, faster, faster!

Oh, come on, son,

yeah, just like that!

Yes, faster, faster!

Oh, yeah, oh, f*** yeah,

John Paul, nice drivin'!

I think I'm gonna blow

a big load

All over your chest, son!

You're doin' great!

Robb, Robb, don't make my dad

jerk himself off.

It's disrespectful.

Oh my god, it's just a doll,

you f***in' fruit.

It's not just a doll.

My dad's ashes

are in that thing!



Why didn't you tell me that,


Before I started

jerkin' him off?

Oh, I'm gonna tell ya I put my

dad's f***in' ashes in a doll?

Sorry, Mr. Tremblay,

you were an incredible racer.

I didn't mean to Jack

your beautiful cock.

- That's enough!

- Punch it!

- Go, Robb, go! Go!

- Oh yeah!

Are these guys ever

gonna grow up?

- Oh, I hope not!

- Go, baby, go!

Nice runnin', baby!

You shave off

11 seconds of time!

F***in' women!

Oh my god,

that was so much fun!

Daddy's gonna kick some ass

next week, you little alien!

Rate this script:(4.00 / 1 vote)

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Swearnet: The Movie" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 20 Sep. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/swearnet:_the_movie_19213>.

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