Oslo, 31. august

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I remember taking the first dip in

the Oslo fjord on the first of May.

I remember driving into

Oslo on Sunday at sunset.

The city was completely empty.

I remember how tall the trees seemed

compared to those in Northern Norway.

I remember thinking,

"I'll remember this."

I remember dad sitting

in the kitchen, smoking.

Drinking coffee,

listening to the radio.

I don't remember Oslo as such,

it's people I remember.

ukfilm.in

We moved to the city.

We felt extermely mature.

ukfilm.in

I remember hours on trams,

busses, the metro, -

ukfilm.in

- walking along endless roads

to some mythical party, -

ukfilm.in

- where you never knew whether

you were invited or not.

I remember how free I felt

the first time I came to Oslo.

Then I realised how small Oslo is.

I remember mom showing me where

she once rented a room.

- There's only offices there now.

- Every football match I've played, -

- was with friends I still have.

And that's because I'm from Oslo.

- I remember his laughter.

- The scent of salt on her skin.

Everyone was sure we'd win.

I remember the disappointment.

- I remember the first snow.

- Everyone smoked back then.

How he insisted "melancholy"

was cooler than "nostalgic".

We had so much time on our hands.

How my bed didn't fit into the flat.

- I remember walking past his flat.

- I remember having a best friend.

- It's a parking lot today.

- I never saw him again.

I remember when they

tore down the Philips building.

- Getting high on food now, Gisle?

- Shut up.

And I never had that feeling

when I went out before.

But I do now, and I don't know why.

Because I've been doing great here.

But the last month or two, -

I've really started to worry.

Because...

Well, I'm scared shitless.

Scared of the future?

It's like I'm right back to

when I started doing drugs.

As if I'm back in primary school

emotionally.

That black...

Void, or...

It's like it's back.

And the relief -

- from shooting up is gone.

So I have serious doubts

about how I'm going to live now.

How to live with it.

Thanks.

The past days I haven't had any...

I haven't had strong

feelings in any direction.

I feel tired, but that's

because I havent slept well.

- You've got a big job interview today.

- Yeah.

Would you like to talk about it?

Well, there's not much to talk about.

This is for the return trip. Remember

to tell them to enter via Losbyveien.

Taxis from Oslo always have

trouble finding us out here.

I'll see you back here later.

Goodbye and good luck.

- Hello?

- Hi, it's Anders.

Wow. Hi, Anders. Come in.

You see who's here?

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Remember me?

- I was just in the neighbourhood.

- Cool. Come in.

- Is this a bad time?

- No, not at all.

Long time no see.

- Want some coffee, Anders?

- Yeah, sure.

We have drinking-yoghurt,

juice, beer. Want a beer?

No, coffee will be fine.

Thanks.

You're having beer? He doesn't

usually drink for lunch.

You've completed the program?

I've got two more weeks,

then I'm done.

- You think it's helped?

- Well...

- Is that a troll?

- I guess so.

Why did you draw a troll?

- You're looking at Anders?

- Because it's so big.

So big, right.

Anders used to be a drug troll.

Have you heard about heroin

and speed and so on? Or khat?

- You've heard of "cat"?

- Yes.

Daddy used to party with

Anders sometimes.

But now I have to be here with

you and mom, which is really nice.

You want to give him the drawing?

- Is it for me? thanks a lot.

- You're welcome.

She seems to like you.

There's this guy at the home, -

- some pitiful junky,

who had to play Thomas.

- What do you mean?

- We do role playing, psychodrama.

It's part of the treatment.

The other residents play people -

- in my life, like my sister or you.

So a dopehead plays me?

"A dopehead." So how's it done?

Well, you have to improvise.

They stand in a circle, try

to tempt me with stuff.

"Anders, remember how the dope

makes you feel warm inside."

"You can just smoke it,

no need to shoot up."

Well, stuff like that, you know.

And... But the guys who played

you, didn't have much to...

- Not much to go on?

- No relevant experience.

They were suppose to tempt

me with academic stuff.

But they had no idea.

"I've got a really awesome book here,

a really cool book. Adorno..."

- Seems they captured my complexity.

- He tempted me with his academia.

I can't believe you fell for it.

Well, it always ends the same

way, with the same words:

"I love you, Anders. I forgive you."

Like it's something they all

think they need to head.

But enough of that.

- You look well.

- You think so?

I didn't get much sleep last night.

I had my first so-called

"evening leave".

I met Malin.

She's moving to Stockholm.

- Malin? Do I know her?

- How could you?

Anders pulls so many women

you can't keep track.

- I don't think you've met.

- Here I am, feeling sorry for you.

Looking so tired. But you've just

been hustling Swedish chicks.

I don't know.

I wasn't quite there.

Maybe I expected too much.

I felt nothing.

Proust said, "Trying to understand

desire by watching a nude woman" -

- " is like a child taking apart

a clock to understand time."

Jeez. He's trying to be personal,

and you hit him with a quote!

So if he's personal, I

have to be personal too?

But it's been ages since I

slept with a Swedish chick.

But his point was the opposite

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