
Not Another Teen Movie
I just hope it doesn't cause any
permanent damage.
- How long have you been here, anyway?
- A while.
- You missed yourprom?
- Yeah.
The thing is, when I made that bet--
There he is. It's Freddie.
He's wearing a tux.
What's up? I met a whole other
person inside ofyou.
There's a whole otherperson
inside ofboth of us.
Would the whole otherperson...
...like to dance?
Yes.
- Morning, sweetie!
- Daddy!
- Why are you in here?
- Why am I in here?
It's her birthday, Dad.
Happy birthday, sweetie.
- What's that buzzing sound?
- I just need a minute, here.
Maybe it's that construction.
Where's my little angel?
Happy birthday, honey.
Grandma? Grandpa?
Rosco!
Rosco, go.
- Hello.
- Father O'Flannagan?
I brought your special friends
from the center!
- Happy birthday!
- Janey's making faces.
It smells in here.
Okay, make a wish, dear.
No.
This isn't a typical high school.
At John Hughes, there are no cliques,
You're accepted for you,
not who you hang out with.
We'll divide into groups
so you can get to know your peers.
Let's get all you jocks
in one group...
...and get you slutty girls
over here by me.
Hey, how you doing?
Welcome.
You losers should
hang out in the back.
Come on, get back there.
Take a look at the kid
standing beside you.
They're your only friends
for the next four years.
Okay, let's move it, people!
- You need to start dating.
- I don't date. You know that.
Janey, you know Dad's rule.
I can't have sex before you.
I don't conform to
typical high-school norms.
I read Sylvia Plath,
listen to Bikini Kill and eat tofu.
- I'm a unique rebel.
- More like you're a lesbo.
Mitch, leave your sister alone.
Thank you, Daddy.
If Janey wants to be a rug-muncher,
that's her decision.
Go! Fight! Win!
Nice combination, Crissy!
I've been meaning to get that fixed.
Later, Dad.
I'll be late to pick you up.
Why? A job interview?
No, honey.
I'll probably just be way too drunk.
That's good.
No drinking and driving.
Oh, I'll be driving.
I'll just be too drunk to remember.
Okay. Bye, Daddy.
Bye, pumpkin-head.
- Oh, my God!
- Get out of the road!
Oh, my God, it's Jake.
- Hi, stud.
- Hi, Jake.
- I love that thing with his eyebrows.
- Those sideburns.
Oh, my God, there's Jake.
He's so popular.
He just looked at me.
- Here. You can keep it.
- Tiff.
Hi, Jake. It's all wet.
Melanie.
Hey, Jake.
Hey, Arthur.
Here's Ricky!
Hey, Ricky.
How was your weekend?
Friday night I stood
outside your window in the rain...
...screaming your name.
Then I spent Saturday and Sunday
making you this great...
...l've-been-desperately-trying-
to-tell-you-that...
...l'm-madly-in-love-with-you...
...mix tape for your birthday.
A mix tape?
That's so sweet, Ricky.
See you in English.
Catch you guy later.
What happening?
Damn, Shorty, Dog is pretending
to be Asian, and shit.
That cracker is white!
Can't he see that, yo?
Did you get any action this weekend?
- I visit grandfather.
- I played with my sisters.
We're pathetic.
How will we ever lose our virginity
by graduation?
- We're freshmen.
- What's with the attitude?
- Not easy to get lucky here.
- Girls are sensitive.
They're not looking for sex.
They're looking for love.
Love me! Harder!
Amanda Becker.
She is so perfect.
Keep dreaming.
What's up, Reggie Ray?
I can't wait until Friday's game.
What about your head? You have
a blood clot the size of a grapefruit.
Five more concussions and you'll die.
You should take it easy.
- Don't listen to him.
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"Not Another Teen Movie" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 3 Mar. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/not_another_teen_movie_14963>.