I Declare War

Synopsis: Armed with nothing more than twigs, their imaginations and a simple set of rules, a group of 12-year-olds engaged in a lively game of Capture the Flag in the neighborhood woods start dangerously blurring the lines between make-believe and reality. Paint-filled balloons = Grenades. Trees = Control towers. Sticks = Sub-machine guns. The youthful innocence of the game gradually takes on a different tone as the quest for victory pushes the boundaries of friendship. The would-be warriors get a searing glimpse of humanity's dark side as their combat scenario takes them beyond the rules of the game and into an adventure where fantasy combat clashes with the real world.
Genre: Action, Comedy, Drama
Director(s): Jason Lapeyre, Robert Wilson (co-director)
Production: Drafthouse Films
  2 wins & 1 nomination.
Rotten Tomatoes:
94 min

Stay down.

Did you see anyone?


Down, down! I need a grenade!

One steamboat, two steamboats...

- three steamboats...

- Where are you guys? Come on!

Four steamboats...

five steamboats, six steamboats,

seven steamboats...

I need a fuckin' grenade!

Nine steamboats...

Ten steamboats!

No, it's yours.

You're dead.

Kenney, have you

killed anyone else?

- No.

- Any of ours been killed?

No. I just saw Joker.

He's still alive.

- What about them?

- We know Scott's dead.

Yeah, who else?

Then we'll assume they're all alive.

I need to know where Quinn's base is.

You two, go on recon.

Check everywhere we've used before.

F*ck that. We can find out right now.

Ow! Hey!

- Where's your base?

- Screw off!

You can't interrogate the dead!

Leave him alone.


He's right. Once you're dead,

you go home.

You can't be interrogated.

It's a rule.

F*ck the rules.

It's too hot for rules.

I'm not a cheater.

Go home, Scott.

I'm going to win fair and square.

You're going to lose,

fair and square.

Dude, this is P.K.

He doesn't lose.

Lose what? His virginity?

Huh. I heard

he lost it to your mom.

What did you say, ass-face?

Stop it, now!

I want a tactical strategy

assimilation in thirty minutes.

Now, go!

So, where the hell were you

when I was calling for help?

Kenney was there.

You didn't know he was there.

- Sure I did.

- Okay, yeah, well...

...you still sent me

out there to get shot, right?

To get Scott to come out?

Only because I knew Kenney

was there and Scott would be killed.

Don't worry, Paul. We're a team.

What are you doing after the war?

You're coming over, and we're eating

pizza and watching a movie.

What movie?


- Again?

- Yes.

Now get out there

so that I can win this war.

- P.K.'s your best friend, right?

- Yeah.

He's kind of an asshole.

- No, he's not.

- With all his stupid rules.

Oh, you think it's a coincidence

that he's won every single game

of war he's ever played?

C'mon, just follow your orders.

Find the base, then go back to P.K.?

That's the stupidest thing

I've ever heard.

If we find the base, let's just

kill everyone and take the flag!

Shut up! You think

Quinn doesn't have a plan?

He's been planning this war

against P.K. for months now.

You're gonna screw it all up.

- You're such a bitch right now.

- No, I'm not!

You're P.K.'s bitch.

I'm nobody's bitch.

I'm gonna march

right into their base,

stick my gun right

in Quinn's stupid face,

blow his head off,

shoot everyone else,

grab the flag... aah!


Well, if it isn't some

of P.K.'s little soldiers...

and the general's best friend.

We rule.



- Grab his gun.

- What?

You can't do that.

Why? You gonna tell P.K. on us?

Kick him again, Sikorski.


Grab him.

A girl.

- You're a girl.

- Sorry.

I can help, though.


You can be the arts

and crafts squadron.

Since when do girls even like war?

Actually, this is my first war.


I dunno. I can appreciate war.

Strategy, tactics, stuff like that.

Like chess.

You play chess?

Yeah, I play a lot of chess.

Huh. Yeah, me too.

Hm. That's funny.

But don't get me wrong.

I'm serious.

I'll kill people.

I have killing techniques.

Like what?

Just, you know...



Let me show you something.


Look at this.

Oh, you're kidding.


- Did you build that?

- Yeah.

I mean, I got the idea

off the Internet, but I built it.

You get it, right? What it's for?

A bomb.

That's the bomb.


Unfortunately, it can only carry

the weight of one grenade.

What if you broke the amount

of paint up into two balloons?

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"I Declare War" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 21 Feb. 2020. <https://www.scripts.com/script/i_declare_war_10473>.

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