I Am Not a Hipster

---

(Clearing throat)

How's it going?

I, uhh...

I can't believe

you guys showed up

considering how much

of an a**hole I am.

Uhh, I want to thank Joel

and Darla for helping me out,

and Tim for letting me play.

So, feels like

it's been a while.

I hope I don't screw this up.

Feed me, make yourself proud

Fill my mouth up

until I drown

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh

You pulled me onto dry land

Shoved me out with the same

two hands, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Ah, ah, ah, ah

Ah, ah, ah, ah

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah

We dive in, never come back

And each of us has to

learn from scratch

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

F***!

Uhh...

I think Tim might have given me

one too many whiskey shots.

I think I might have to

go gag myself in the bathroom.

WOMAN:

Woo!

Uhh...

Yeah, just give me a second.

Sorry.

Just a second.

Screw around for a little bit.

(Retching)

(Spitting)

(Groaning)

(Speaking Japanese)

Oh!

(Phone ringing)

WOMAN:

Brook?

Are you there?

Pick up the phone.

I hope you know we're staying

with you for three days.

We're excited to see you.

WOMAN 2:

Tell him I say hi.

WOMAN:

Mez says hi.

Umm, sorry, I didn't want to

leave this on your machine.

But I don't know, I just don't

want you to be surprised.

Dad's coming so...

Just... Will you call me

if you get this? I love you.

Okay, bye.

(Phone ringing)

What's up, Clarke?

You answered the phone!

What's up, man?

It's me, Clarke.

I know.

Hi, man.

Well, I just wanted to, uhh...

to let you know that,

today, I woke up.

And I felt very inspired

and motivated to, like,

push our career

into, like,

another level, dude.

It's going to be awesome, man.

Umm, anyways, so I wanted to

go over some bullet points

for today's radio interview,

dude.

Oh, sh*t, that's today?

Yeah.

You know I hate doing

this kind of stuff.

I really don't see the point.

Well, as your manager,

I think you should really

take advantage of

this opportunity, dude.

Clarke.

Yeah?

I don't need a manager, man.

Oh.

I'll just work on some stuff.

And then I'll meet you there.

Oh my God,

thank you so much, Brook.

It's going to be awesome,

I'm telling you.

All right, okay. So, I'll see

you there, all right?

Okay, cool. Umm, so I'll see

you at the radio interview.

And just call me

if you can't make it

'cause this guy's really,

really looking forward

to meeting you. And that's it.

And I know I'm talking a lot.

Sorry, Brook.

That's okay.

Okay, man. Umm...

I'll see you later.

I love you.

(Beeping)

Oh

Ah

Shivering

I am looking in at

People that I

call my friends

Just a silhouette

With a cigarette

No idea who I am

There was soul in these eyes

But now they're gone,

if only I

Held a light in

Ah

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Flashing teeth

They are smiling so

Happy to burn their time

And I don't know when

But I lost the will

to save her mind

Ah!

Hey, fuckhead! What's this?

A f***ing bike lane, isn't it?

Have you got

a f***ing green light?

Have you got a green light, man?

Oh, look, it's still here,

still... Oh, ho!

See? That was, like, 35 seconds.

So, did you listen to

that new Paper Ted album

I sent you this morning?

Nope.

You got to check

your email more.

This guy is blowing my mind.

He's, like, New Wave-ish,

kind of like the Nimbles

in the early '90s.

And this guy has a Master's

in Electrical Engineering

or something like that.

He makes his own sounds, like...

(Beatboxing)

It's sick.

I can't even explain it.

Look, I really got to piss.

How much time do I have?

Five minutes.

All right.

Hey, I was going to ask you,

think you could perform at

my art show this Thursday?

Man, you know how I am

about that kind of stuff.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, no. You know,

it's only a couple songs.

It would be, actually,

really fast.

I just hate playing

at art shows, man.

People talk too much.

Yeah, I hate that.

It's annoying.

I'm going to be there.

I just don't want to play.

It's...

I'll figure something out.

You sure?

Yes. Am I sure?

Yeah, focus on this.

Umm, don't forget to

plug Friday's show.

I'm going to be

listening to you online.

And... And, uhh, yeah, man,

rock it out. You look good.

I'm excited for you.

That's all I wanted to...

Close the door.

There it is, closed.

I just gave Canines

a re-listen this morning.

And it's just... It's just cool

to play some honest stuff.

You know what I mean?

Cool, thanks.

Hey, Ronnie,

let's get a level on this guy.

Will you say something?

Uhh, Ronnie,

let's get a level on this guy.

(Laughing)

Okay, here we go,

in five, four...

It's the underground,

it's the underground

It's the underground

What's up, guys?

It's 1:
10 on the clock.

This is your man Bradley Haines

with an instalment of

SD Underground,

bringing you everything

we can dig up

about the San Diego

indie rock scene.

Now, sitting right across from

me is a really special guest.

You might remember him

from a little project

he released last year

entitled Canines.

It came completely

out of the blue

and blew up on the internet

practically overnight.

Yeah, you know who

I'm talking about.

I'm talking about

singer-songwriter Brook Hyde.

Brook, welcome to my studio.

Thanks.

(Inaudible)

Let's just give the folks

a little background about you.

You're... You're fairly new

to our city, correct?

Uhh, yeah. I've been here

about two years.

I guess that's fairly new.

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