I, Madman

Evening, Dr. Kessler.

Front desk.

Yes, ma'am.

We'll certainly check it out.

-Right away.

-Problem, Lyle?

Miss Wells in 413.

She claims there are animal noises

coming from the room next door.

She thinks it might be a dog.

-She says it's keeping her awake.

-Are you going to check it out?

That's Dr. Kessler's room.

You know how he feels about people

going into his room when he's not in there.

He hasn't had--

The man is a weirdo, Lyle,

and a troublemaker.

And if he is keeping an animal,

he'll be out on the street before morning.

Damn!

Oh, God!

Good God!

It's a child!

Lyle, it's me.

Call the police.

Just do it.

Hello.

Richard?

Hi, I'm not here right now.

So after the beep, leave your name...

number, and a brief message

and I'll try and get back to you. Thanks.

Hello, Richard, it's me, Virginia.

I just thought, maybe, you'd like

to come over for a beer or something.

I thought maybe you'd be home, but....

I'll be up for a while.

So if you get home before...

you know, too late,

just give me a call. Okay?

And....

Who is it?

Police. Open up.

Richard. Come on up.

Hi.

Are you okay?

Yeah, why?

You sounded a little agitated on the phone.

No.

That was just my phone voice.

Can I get you a beer or something?

Yeah, I'd love a cold beer.

Then why don't you

just go sit in there and I'll go get it for you.

"Much of Madness, More of Sin"?

"Tortured and ridiculed

by the scientific establishment...

"for his investigations

into the creation of superior life forms...

"noted zoologist Dr. Alan Kessler...

"continues his experiments...

"in the cloaked secrecy

of his basement laboratory.

"Finally, after years of failure

and frustration...

"he manages to successfully mate

his own seed with an egg excised...

"from the ovaries of a jackal...

"and plants it in the womb

of an unwitting human surrogate."

A little light reading?

So, scared yourself again

and lured me over with a cold beer...

-so you wouldn't have to be alone?

-You caught me.

Honey, how can you read this crap?

I don't know. It's some thing....

It's like potato chips, I just can't stop.

Potato chips?

I don't know, this one was different.

It was really special.

-Very well written.

-I'll bet.

What happens?

-With what?

-The book.

How does it end?

The surrogate dies in delivery.

Dr. Kessler has to raise the creature

as his own son.

But it's an evil, wild thing.

And he can't control it.

I know the feeling.

One night, somebody...

lets the jackal boy escape.

And Dr. Kessler goes out looking for it,

and he hunts it down.

Corners it in an alley.

And he begs it to come home with him.

But it hates him.

It hates him for bringing it into this world.

It turns...

and it leaps, and screaming in agony....

I don't see what the problem is.

It's not like he asked you to marry him.

-Yeah, well....

-Excuse me.

We've only been seeing each other

for six weeks.

He already wants me to meet his parents

over Christmas.

Crimson Falls, Ohio.

I don't know,

sounds like a pre-proposal to me.

Pre-proposal?

Excuse me.

I think I'll take these.

All I know is,

if I had a guy like Richard on the line...

I'd reel him in.

Yeah, I can see you

in a muumuu and curlers...

scrambling up eggs for your husband.

You don't know it, but deep down

underneath this chic, cosmopolitan savvy...

beats the heart of a submissive hausfrau.

Richard's really special,

but I think I'll just take it slow.

All I'm saying is, if I had Mr. Right...

I'd be home packing my bags

for Crimson Falls.

You're sure not gonna meet him

putting in 14 hours a day at this dump.

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