
Hector and the Search for Happiness
1
(MUSIC PLAYING)
(AIRPLANE HUMMING)
(DRUMBEATS)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
(SLAPPING HAND, PANTING)
Clara!
Hector.
- Morning, sweetheart.
- Morning.
Time to rise, time to shine.
HECTOR:
Mm.NARRATOR:
Once upon a time,there was a young psychiatrist
called Hector,
who had a very satisfactory life.
His world was tidy,
uncomplicated...
And he liked it that way.
(SLUSHING)
He took great comfort
in its predictable patterns.
Patterns his girlfriend Clara
was happy to maintain.
Thank you.
Bye.
Oh!
NARRATOR:
Any lapsewas swiftly rectified.
(WINGS FLAPPING)
(BELLS TOLLING)
Hector had a great deal
of patience
for his patients,
if you see what I mean.
Every day, I ask myself,
"How could my marriage
just explode the way it did?"
NARRATOR:
And likeall the best psychiatrists,
he knew how to answer
a question with a question.
Jane, what does exploding
mean to you?
ANJALI:
It's no good.I have lost my psychic mojo.
Oh, I just can't see
a way out.
Hector, look at me,
I want the truth.
Do you see my light?
Here.
Please, don't lie to me.
I see your point.
(DOOR BUZZER HUMMING)
NARRATOR:
His patients nevercrossed paths with each other.
They couldn't.
Once in a while,
Hector prescribed pills
Roger, have you taken your meds?
I am fucking Ferrari.
What?
NARRATOR:
Experimentinguntil he landed upon
- the one most suitable.
- Roger...
Two fat ladies!
Eighty-eight.
NARRATOR:
They gave his name
to their friends
who gave his name
to their friends.
(CAR HONKING)
After all, Hector's rates
were very fair.
They hadn't changed in years.
Okay-
Come to think of it,
neither had Hector.
CLARA'S BOSS:
And if that wasn't enough...
within six days,
for a companion drug,
which had eluded the marketing
department for six months.
(CHEERING)
Now, that's a talent for words.
But what I love most
about her
is that in the 10 years
that she's been with us,
she has yet to discover
the words "maternity" or "leave."
(LAUGHING, GROANING)
- Clara.
- (CLAPPING)
Thank you, all, so much.
What's in a name?
A glimmer of hope.
A chance for change.
That's right.
A way to alleviate suffering.
It's been five years
since we launched Tranquiline.
Correction. No, it's been
a lifetime for those
- who benefited from it.
- Yeah.
I'm getting emotional.
To Marketing.
- (CHEERING)
- I love you guys!
(CHEERING)
- (PERSIAN MUSIC PLAYING)
- C'est magnifique!
Hit that key.
(CAT-CALLING, JINGLING)
(PERSIAN MUSIC PLAYING)
- (GIGGLING)
- No. No..
Not me. Not me. Oh!
- (CHEERING)
- Come on!
Give them money.
(PERSIAN MUSIC)
(JINGLING, CHEERING)
(SLURRING) Oh, it's...
Yay!
(INAUDIBLE)
"What am I doing?"
(FRENCH ACCENT)
You are intriguing me.
(SPEAKING FRENCH)
You are not working
with these people?
Oh, no, I'm Hector.
I'm a psychiatrist.
Psychiatrist.
Hello.
You can help me.
Oh, I think not.
But I want a penis.
- A penis.
- You mean happiness.
Everybody want 'appiness
but you cannot own 'appiness.
Yes, sorry.
It's, uh, elusive, yeah.
- You can't touch happiness.
(SPEAKING FRENCH)
- (LAUGHING)
- FRENCH LADY:
I do!Listen to me, I want
a penis in my bottom.
(LAUGHING GROGGILY)
No, no, you want happiness
from the bottom of your heart.
That is what I said,
a penis... in my bottom.
(LAUGHING)
Stop it.
HECTOR:
Oh, God!- Ahh!
- CLARA:
Oh!(PANTING)
I love my Hector.
I love my Clara.
No, really, I love
my weird-ass-eccentric-
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Citation
Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:
"Hector and the Search for Happiness" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 26 Jan. 2021. <https://www.scripts.com/script/hector_and_the_search_for_happiness_9786>.