
Graduation
(0.00 / 0 votes)By your Senior
year in High School,
you either know what you want
to do in life or you don't.
But first comes
graduation.
Ours was today.
except for one thing...
The police
had us surrounded.
# let's go #
# I wanna take you
for a ride... #
I want...
to get
into Harvard.
Okay, I want
a date to prom.
But she's gotta
like Iggy, yeah,
and have long legs
and-- oh, sh*t!
I want...
a 10-inch penis.
Whoo-hoo!
I want...
Get out.
Oh, hey, this isn't the last
one before graduation, right?
No. No, dude,
we definitely got time.
-Bye.
- Don't work too late, Carl.
Good night, Jackson.
Hey.
- Sleep tight.
- I would sleep so much tighter
If I had something
to hold on to.
- Hold on to this.
- Hey hey!
- Bye.
- Bye.
Hey, mama.
- Hey hey, Polly.
- Hey.
Going back to work?
Yeah yeah, I gotta crunch
some numbers with Barbara.
This new loan
program's a mess.
- You hear anything?
- I'm not getting in.
- Go to work, please.
- Okay, all right.
Come in through the front.
Your mom's gonna go nuts
If she sees you
all wet like that.
The cheetah has
accelerated from a standstill...
- How you feeling, ma?
- Hey.
The dry scrub brush
of the African plain
Provides a perfect
launching pad...
Legs again, huh?
It's nothing.
So you think
he'll be awake?
Carl? No way.
Carl! Carl!
Get up, man.
Ow! Ow!
Carl needs sleep.
No.
Carl needs coffee.
Mm-hmm,
Carl needs coffee.
- Better?
- Oh yes.
Thanks, hon.
- Hello.
- Good morning, sleepyhead.
Oh, Jesus, I knew you were
from all the way down the hall.
- Ha ha ha.
- Hey, who needs a bowl?
- Hey, I'll take care of that.
No no no, not so fast,
you flash, you.
- Yep, we're making breakfast.
- It's all us.
Do you want the Cap'n
or cornflakes?
Since you're asking,
both.
Thank you.
Hey, Mare, guess what.
Me and Polly got our dorm
assignments for state.
- We're in the same one.
- Oooh!
- They let you in?
- Hey, eat me.
Come on, boys.
Is she not the
cutest girl in the world?
What about you,
Jackson?
Surely you've heard
from a few schools by now.
I didn't have
the scores, Mrs. J.
You don't do something with yourself,
you're gonna have to answer to me.
whoa!
Good morning.
Hey, Dad!
Hi, Dad.
- You know what I mean.
- Watch out, Chauncey!
Wow, man,
You really suck
at driving, don't you?
Excuse me.
Two weeks to graduation
means two weeks
to my final.
Earth to Mr. Boyd.
Can you name me two families
in the Basidiomycota Phylum?
Mr. Jackson,
can you help Mr. Boyd?
No, sir.
Why should we care
about fungi at all?
Yes, Polly.
- Without it, we wouldn't have penicillin.
- Yeah, or beer.
Precisely, Mr. Boyd.
Carl.
- Yeah.
- Come on.
Hey, you thought any more about
your speech you're gonna give?
- I'm not valedictorian.
- Maybe it's a matter of time.
Just do me a favor:
When you do give a speech,
don't talk about the journey
or the future being
wide open.
Or how we're all
the leaders of tomorrow.
- Diamonds in the rough.
- Raw clay.
- I hate raw clay. That's so dumb.
- Okay, I get the idea.
This is so stupid.
- Hey!
- Hey!
Hey, it's late.
What are you doing here?
I told your mom
I had to drop off
Some homework.
She's still home.
She's downstairs.
Yeah, I know. It's
never stopped us before.
Oh, my god!
- Come here.
- No no no.
I just-- I-- I--
okay.
No, I--
I just don't feel
like it, okay?
What's wrong?
I got into Harvard.
Oh my god. It's
amazing. I mean--
It's not S.U.
No no, I know
it's not, but--
Okay--
There's still Thanksgiving
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"Graduation" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Web. 30 Jan. 2023. <https://www.scripts.com/script/graduation_9251>.
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