Get Him to the Greek

BLACKNESS:

SFX:
CLAPPING

EXT. UCLA LAWN - DAY

AARON GREENBERG (early 20s) is walking across the stagegetting his diploma. He could not be more excited. If youcould bottle enthusiasm, generosity of spirit and a touch ofnaivety, you would get this young gentleman. He gets hisdiploma, hugs the president of the university hard, and wavesto the crowd who cheer him on. He throws kisses towards

someone in particular.

ANGLE ON HIS PRETTY, ARTSY GIRLFRIEND, DAPHNE BINKS (early *

20s), also in a cap and gown, and her parents, MR. AND MRS. *

BINKS. She smiles, waves and throws kisses back. *

INT. ALDOUS’S GIANT MODERN APARTMENT - NIGHT *

We hear the VOICE of Aldous Snow (30s), English rock star,

drugged out of his mind, in his empty apartment. Floor to *

ceiling windows look out on beautiful views of the Thames and *

the London cityscape. We PAN PAST a leather couch, a pile of *

trash, an Andy Warhol on the floor, various drugparaphernalia.

ALDOUS (O.S.)

You enjoying this?

PROSTITUTE (O.S.)

You know I am, love.

REVEAL Aldous on the floor kissing a PROSTITUTE-LIKE WOMAN.

ALDOUS:

How about this?

Suddenly Aldous is peeing on the Prostitute.

PROSTITUTE:

I like that alright... what thebloody shit?

ALDOUS:

How about this?

Aldous THROWS UP on the prostitute and COLLAPSES.

PROSTITUTE:

You piece of shit!

2.

The Prostitute KICKS Aldous. Aldous laughs as she leaves.

ALDOUS:

(with an odd flourish)

You are welcome, milady!

He lights a cigarette, grabs the remote and FLIPS ON THE TV.

INT. SATURN DEALERSHIP - DAY

We ZOOM IN on Aaron getting the keys to a brand new SATURNVUE. He’s with Daphne. They hug and kiss.

EXT. HORSE AND CARRIAGE PUB - NIGHT

A crazily drunk Aldous gets TOSSED OUT of the pub’s PLATEGLASS WINDOW. A BIG IRISH GUY comes out.

IRISH GUY:

You best not be coming back here.

I don’t care how famous you are.

ALDOUS:

We should have killed all you Irishwhen we had the chance.

The Irish Guy GRABS Aldous. Aldous licks the Irish guy’sface. The Irish Guy drops him, disgusted.

ALDOUS (CONT’D)

Make love to me my Irish lass! *

EXT. DOWNTOWN LOS ANGELES ARTISTS’ LOFT BUILDING - DAY

Aaron and Daphne are in a rather grungy area of downtown LA.

They walk through a protective cage into a newly renovatedbuilding that is advertising “Real Artists’ Lofts.”

INT. ARTIST LOFT APARTMENT - DAY

Aaron and Daphne walk with a REALTOR around the loft space.

There’s a studio with a potter’s wheel. Daphne’s clearly inheaven.

AARON:

We will rent it.

DAPHNE:

Are you sure you can afford it?

3.

AARON:

Definitely!

Daphne jumps up and down, hugs Aaron and heads off to explorethe loft. Aaron looks very, very nervous.

INT. ALDOUS SNOWS’S LIVING ROOM - DAY *

Aldous and a COURTNEY LOVE-ESQUE girlfriend.

ROCKER GIRLFRIEND

YOU F*CKED ME OVER YOU PIECE OF

SHIT!!!

ALDOUS:

I’M NOT THE ONE WHO F*CKED YOU

OVER!!! YOU’RE THE ONE WHO F*CKED

ME OVER!!!

ROCKER GIRLFRIEND

F*CK YOU YOU F*CK F*CK F*CK!!!

ALDOUS:

THEN GET OUT OF HERE ALREADY YOU

F*CKING BLOODY HELL BITCH!

Aldous grabs her. She punches him in the face. He punchesher in the chest, and then they get into a crazy fist fightlike a couple burly man. In a crazy almost karate like move,

she kicks his feet out from under him. He CRASHES through aglass coffee table. She leaves the room.

EXT. ALDOUS’S ULTRA LUXURY APARTMENT BUILDING - DAY *

His door flies open. It’s the middle of the day in thecenter of London. It’s very, very busy. She’s walkingacross the lawn.

ALDOUS:

DON’T GO!!! I LOVE YOU!!! DON’T

GO!!! PLEASE!!!!

A YOUNG TWEEN GIRL and her FRIEND see Aldous.

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