Expelled

Welcome back, Felix.

It's good to be back, Gary.

It says here that you've had

two suspensions

In the last semester.

Oh, that can't be right.

I thought that was three.

Two, Felix.

Two suspensions.

The first was in September

For rewiring the cheerleaders

fund-Raiser money

To a koala bear sanctuary.

Noble cause, don't you think?

I think you owe an apology

to a dozen cheerleaders.

I think there are

two dozen koalas

That would disagree

with that, Gary.

And then again, in October

For programming

the gym scoreboard

To display an indecent photo

of Mrs. Jensen.

Whoo!

I think I did everyone a favor

with that one.

I'm not gonna play games

with you, Felix.

Two suspensions

in a single semester

Is unheard of here at Eastwood.

Mr. Truman, I understand

I'm... I'm not what you'd consider

an exemplary student.

But I believe I play

a pivotal role

In the operations

of this school.

If I wasn't here to test

the rules,

How would the other students

even know they existed?

Today I was told

That you hacked

the vending machines

To give out

free gum to students.

Is that true?

Gum?

Are you trying to get expelled?

And deny you the pleasure

of my company?

I'm expelling you, Felix.

That's it.

Wait.

Seriously?

That was your third strike.

So that means I-I can't come

to class anymore?

Oh, you'll never set foot

in the school again.

Gary...

I don't know how to thank you.

Incredible.

I spent my whole school career

trying to ditch class,

And they punish me by giving me

an early retirement.

Right now Mr. Truman

is about to call my mom

To let her know

about my expulsion.

I can't let that happen.

Oh! Oh!

On average, an Eastwood high

fire drills take 11 minutes.

I only need 10.

Yo, Felix!

Danny boy.

What's up, buddy?

You pulled the fire alarm again?

Of course. Did I get you out

of that trig test?

You got me out of the trig test.

- Timed it perfectly.

- Yeah.

Yo, I heard you got suspended.

Nope, expelled.

- Whoa, what? Are you serious?

- Yeah.

Dude, your parents

are gonna kill you.

Only if they find out,

and they won't.

- What makes you say that?

- We'll talk soon.

I got a take an important call

in eight and a half minutes.

You're insane!

I programmed my mom's phone

To forward her calls

to my Skype account.

When Mr. Truman calls,

I'll just...

Excuse me.

I got to take this.

Hello?

Expelled?

Expelled, Mrs. O'neil.

We have a three-Strike policy

here at Eastwood,

And that was his third strike.

What are we gonna do with him?

Who, me?

No, not you.

Ben.

What happened?

I thought he was improving.

His grades are getting worse.

Last year, my brother, Ben,

forged a report card.

When my parents found out,

they sent him

To the mountain

disciplinary academy.

Located in the foot hills

of Montana,

It's more of a jail

than a school.

There's bar on windows,

Wardens instead of teachers.

I heard it smells like butthole.

He got a 1.7 GPA.

Unbelievable.

What about you, Felix?

How are things at school?

Things are great.

I aced my trig test.

There you go.

Wow.

Great job, kiddo.

Yep.

Studied for it all week.

- I like to hear that.

- Yes.

Diane says the report cards

are coming out in a few days.

Mm, and what kind of grades

can we expect to see?

Lots of "A" s.

Aw.

Looks like I'm gonna need

a new report card.

Getting a decent report card

here at Eastwood

Is pretty difficult...

slightly more difficult

when you've been expelled.

There are only seven people

With the power to print

a report card.

Just one of them is a student.

She's Mr. Truman's T.A.

She also happens to be

my bitter ex-Girlfriend.

Someone's coming.

I do not have time

to talk to you.

You haven't heard

what I want talk about.

Now we've already talked

more than I wanted.

I need a report card.

Then I suggest

going back to school,

Preferably

somewhere far from here.

Ouch.

Or you could just print one

for me.

No.

Um, weren't you expelled?

Um, yeah.

Can you please go?

Any reason you keep covering

Stacy's anti-Bullying postings?

- I want to win.

- I can help with that.

I don't think so.

Oh, come on.

We both know I can.

Vanessa, don't.

He's trouble.

Can you finish this for me?

Sure.

Bye.

So Stacy's favored

to win this thing.

Yeah, I figured.

So how do I beat her?

Oh, it's actually really simple.

Just hand out

cute little marshmallows

- With your name on them.

- Do I need to slap you?

Hey, guys?

Could you possibly get

off the stairs?

You're in the shot.

It blows my mind that people

like her so much.

Hey, hey, come over here.

I'll interview you

for my bullying segment.

I want you to end her.

That can be arranged.

Can you get me my report card?

Yes, I can get you

a report card.

Great. I'll take

straight "A" s, please.

Do you have the slightest clue

as to how much work

Goes into getting

straight "A" s?

Mm... don't care.

I'll take straight "A" s, please.

Done.

What's the plan?

All it takes is a single tweet.

Roxy?

Roxy.

Meet Roxy.

Roxy is infamous for ruining

the lives of students

With vicious rumors.

I am no exception.

"Leave it to Felix O'Neil

to creep on the girl's bathroom

"Through a hole on the ceiling.

Peepingtom."

It all happened when Vanessa

and I were dating freshman year.

After school, I tried

to break into the library

To borrow a new P.C.

Aah!

This isn't the boys' bathroom.

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