Enemies Closer

Whoa!

Sorry, dude.

We didn't mean to sneak up on you.

It's just that we can't get to

where we want to go.

Oh, where do you want to go?

We're looking for Pike's Trail.

- Pike's Trail?

- Yeah.

This map we got at the

dock is no good.

Yeah. Well, north is up.

That might help.

And you might wanna think about

staying close to the shoreline here.

There's no cell reception

in case you get lost.

Just head up the trail

about three clicks,

you'll see a big oak tree, hook left.

About another half click and...

it should be right in front of you.

- Thanks.

- Thank you.

Also, hey, a couple house rules here

on Kings Island.

You gotta go by dark, don't leave

any trash and... no drinking.

Okay.

So... unload the beer.

Come on, dude.

- Have a nice day.

- Bye.

By the way,

don't let anyone see that flask.

How's your day going? Okay?

You know, this is the river

that leads down to the lake.

We had to put this...

that we have of the island.

It's the biggest one,

but there's also a list

of things on here.

Oh, there's no cell service up here.

I'm afraid you'll just have to look

at the lake.

Hey, Mister Sanderson.

Are you home?

I actually know that you're around...

'cause I saw the smoke

coming outta the chimney.

Are you cooking something?

Are you cooking like a stew?

It smells really good.

It smells like good stew.

You wanna invite me in for some?

- Hey.

- Go away. I'm fine.

I know, I know.

I'm just doing my job.

You're the only other guy

who lives on this island.

What would people think of me

if I didn't check in on my neighbor?

Exactly what part of "I'm fine"

don't you understand?

I...

Thanks for checking in on me, Henry.

Hey, no problem, Mister Sanderson.

Wanna come in for dinner?

Oh, wouldn't wanna impose.

The radius is too big.

Sh*t, we should've hit these guys

before take-off.

Little thing called probable cause.

We didn't have it,

f***ing Constitution.

We could also use some more men.

Yeah, we could use a lot of things.

We got four thousand miles

of border here.

Only problem is we're looking

at Canada.

Canadians don't wanna

sneak in here.

That's why we don't get squat.

All anyone cares about

is Mexicans sneaking in,

and we just happen to be facing

the wrong f***ing way.

Hang up. Now.

Where are we

with the GPS modulator?

- Uh, nothing pinpointed yet.

- What about border patrol?

Plane was flying too low

for them to track it.

There's only one reason a plane

flies without a transponder...

and low enough to avoid radar,

and that's because they're carrying

a load of some very naughty sh*t.

We're gonna have to troll

the waterways, boys and girls,

and that could take all night.

Open it.

Pardon our intrusion.

We are with the RCMP,

patrolling the area.

We heard you needed help...

in locating a suspected drug

delivery that went down

couple of hours ago along the border.

We have knowledge of the island...

and would like to offer

you our assistance.

You're a bit out of your jurisdiction,

aren't you?

And, uh, we don't use horses.

See, we drive cars.

What Mister Johnson meant to say

is thanks, but no thanks.

Shitload of red-tape to team up

with the Mounties.

Much obliged.

We'll keep you posted.

Pardon me,

but we can be really helpful.

We have HMI lights, we have

generator, we have trolling gear.

If we don't find the drugs

before the runners,

it will be picked up, shipped out,

and chopped down by morning.

Time is of, uh, the essence.

I appreciate your concern,

but not interested.

There's no leads

that we can share at this time.

Well, giddy up.

Hey, what the f***, Frenchie?

I told your boys we

didn't need any help.

Is this some sort of joke?

Do I look funny to you?

Uh, yeah, as a matter of fact,

you do.

Is it my shoes?

Uh, kinda.

You see, I don't wear leather.

I'm a vegan. It's for the environment.

I'm helping the planet.

Do you know that cow farts...

...are responsible for one quarter

of the methane pollution in the world?

Freeze!

Drop the gun.

- Shoot him!

- I can't get a shot!

- We can do this one of two ways.

- Hey! I'm the guy with the gun!

And I'm the guy with the guy.

You can turn over the GPS

location of the crash,

and I spare you a painful death.

Or we can keep on playing games.

I have it.

Good. How close?

Middle of the lake,

few kilometers from shore.

No read on depth, but easily

reachable by boat.

- You're sure?

- Yes.

Let's hope it's wrapped tight.

It was not supposed to be under water.

Let's move.

We'll find out about the ranger.

We won't have any unknowns.

Get the horses en route to the dock.

Four hours

before replacements show up.

Better get the Humvee,

it will be faster.

Think about our carbon footprint.

Think about the children.

Hello? Is anybody here?

Hello?

Down here. Oh!

Thank goodness.

I have been here hours.

I got tired of yelling for help.

Could you come down here, please?

I'm, I'm kind of stuck.

Yeah, hold on. I'll be right there.

- Hi there.

- Hi.

So you got yourself lodged in

here pretty good?

Yeah. It's, uh, it's kinda stupid.

I, um, I saw a blackberry.

Can you believe that?

Twisted my ankle reaching

for it and I slipped.

I'm, uh, I'm pinned in here.

All right. It doesn't seem so bad.

Hold on, wait. Let's just, uh...

How's that? How's the leg?

It's, uh, sore.

- Is it?

- Yeah.

Let's get you up on the path, okay?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes