Die Wand

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Today, on the 5th of November

I begin my report.

I will write everything down as accurate

as I can.

But I don't even know if today

is really the 5th November.

During the past winter

I lost a few days.

I can't even tell you the weekday.

but I think

this is not very important.

I rely on sparse notes.

Sparse, because I never thought

to write this report,

and I'm afraid that much is different

in my memory than I had experienced it.

Perhaps all reports are vague in this way.

I do not write

for the joy of writing.

It just so happens

I need to write,

if I do not

want to lose my mind.

There is no one here

who can think of and care for me.

I'm all alone,

and I must try

to get through the long dark winter months.

I have taken this task upon me,

because it should prevent me

from staring into the twilight and

being afraid.

Because I fear. From all sides

fear creeps up to me,

and I don't want to wait until it reaches

and overpowers me.

I will write until it gets dark.

And this new unfamiliar work

should make my head tired,

empty and sleepy.

I don't fear the morning.

Only the long dusky afternoons.

I write on the back of old calendars

and on aged business papers.

The paper comes from Hugo Rttlinger,

a great collector and hypochondriac.

Actually with Hugo this report should begin,

because without his acquisitiveness and hypochondria,

I wouldn't sit here today.

I probably would not be alive at all.

Not until three clock we reached the hunting lodge.

After a snack,

Hugo started to doze off,

Louise suggested he go with her

to the village one more time.

Come on!

We won't stay long.

We'll go hunting very early in the morning.

The key is in the ignition

if you want to meet us.

Come on!

- Yes.

Where is Luchs?

Luchs?

The dog stays here!

That stupid dog never obeys.

Luchs? Luchs, come on!

Heel!

Come Luchs!

- Heel!

- Don't be so strict.

Luchs, if you don't want to go,

then you stay up here. Go back!

Go! Go!

At nine o'clock I decided to go to bed.

I locked the door and took the key

with me to my room.

Well, Luchs? What's going on?

The two had remained in the village.

I was surprised about this.

Hugo loathed the short inn beds.

And he had never been so callous,

leaving me alone overnight.

Then I decided to go

with Luchs to the village.

I couldn't explain what had happened.

I hardly noticed

how cool and damp the canyon was,

because I was pondering what had

become of the Rttlingers.

Maybe Hugo had

suffered a heart attack.

Like most hypochondriacs, we didn't

take him seriously.

I quickened my steps

and sent Luchs ahead.

I had not thought to wear my

hiking boots

so I stumbled awkwardly

over sharp stones behind him.

Luchs! Luchs?

Luchs? Luchs, what is it?

What do you have?

Did you hurt yourself?

Have you bitten on your tongue?

Luchs come!

Come on!

Luchs, what is it?

Come on!

Then I heard loud knocking,

and as I looked around I realized

it was my own heartbeat

pounding in my ears.

My heart had taken fright

before I knew it.

Hesitantly, I try it again.

And again rested my hand on a glass window.

Suddenly I realized what had unconsciously

tormented me all the while...

...the road was completely empty.

Someone must have sounded the alarm

a long time ago.

It would have been natural

for the curious village people to gather

in front of the wall.

Even if none of them had discovered the wall,

Hugo and Louise must have seen it.

It was more surprising to me

that I couldn't see any people.

I tried it three more times and was convinced

that here, three feet in front of me,

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