Crazy in the Noodle

Synopsis: Pierre Cousin, a depressive compositor, wants to die. After five vain attempts at committing suicide, he decides to hire professional hit men to do the job on him.
Genre: Comedy
79 min


Does he do this every day?

-Normally, he sounds less sad.

This won't work. Too depressing.



Mr Cousin?

-Yes, that's me. Thanks.

A note, sir.

-Sorry, I didn't see that.

Could happen to anyone.

Keep it all.

-Thank you, sir.

Farewell, my friend!

Mr Cousin, phone call for you.

-I'm no longer here.

It's Miss Wanda.

-Wanda, Wanda? I'm coming.

I'm coming.

Why didn't you tell me?

Wanda, yes, this is Pierre.

Good to hear from you.

Dear Wanda.


I still have your letters

with me.

Now? Right away?

I'll be right there.

I smell gas.



My God, the poison.

An antidote...


Milk... milk... milk...

Do you have any milk?

-Yes, there's milk in the fridge.

Have you... milk? Milk! Milk!

Have you got milk?

I can pour it myself.

Make yourself at home.

Thanks, you're too kind.

Excuse me.

People are waiting for me.

Put it on my bill.

Wanda, dear Wanda, I see you...

I relive...

Have you got my letters?

-Your letters, always...

And those are yours.

-Is that why you asked me over?

Ah, Wanda...

I'll explain later.

Who's this gentleman?

The mailman.

It would have been too good.

If you want to kill yourself,

try something else.

You're very lucky.

Last week, I was transporting bricks.

Help! Help! Help!

-Wait, I'm coming.

Help! Help! Help!

-One moment. I'm coming.

Wait for me. I'm coming.

-Help! Help! Help!

Help me...

Where are you?

Where did she go?

I've got her.

No, she's gone.

Anybody there?

Come here, here! This way!

This way, here...


-Put your foot..

Help! Help! Help!

police station

Short, but dry.

-Thank you.

You couldn't leave like that.

Here, coffee.

-You're too kind.

It's the least I can do.

Here's my belt.

-Oh, thanks.

Before I met you,

I was biased about coppers.

Excuse me, I mean the police.

-It's alright.

I was wrong, you're a nice fellow.


I say...

In case you're cold.

-Excuse me.

After you. Just an ID check.

It won't take long.

Congratulations, sir,


Which number?


It's funny.

I hope you won't do it again.

-No, inspector, I was too afraid.

Is she alright?

-Not even a cold.

What were you thinking?

You're young, you're beautiful...

No, don't cry like that.

Have you got a handkerchief?

-Thank you.


Alright, now I can go.

-The inspector wants to see you.

Me? What for?

For a medal.

-Which medal?

A medal because you saved

the lady's life, silly.

But I don't want...

-What a hero.

I'm in a bit of a hurry.

-It won't take long. Sit down.

Do you like the premises?

It was a pleasure to meet you.

It was nice meeting you too.

-You can keep my belt.

You were born in August, correct?

You're a Leo.

Master of the sun, domineering,

cruel commander. Permit me?

Occipital lobe... ambiguous...

parietal lobe... convulsive...

You'd be an excellent opponent

for the Martians.

You have an excellent lifeline.

Middle finger and ring finger are equal.

Hypertrophic palm of the hand.

What does that mean?

You'll live to a 100, sir.

A hundred years? That's not good.

-Better get used to the idea...

...unless someone kills you.

Kills me? Thank you.

Thank you.

You've just saved my life.

Ah, there you are.

-Did you run off again?

Don't touch me.

-Has he been good?

We're going home.

I'll file a complaint with the minister.

-But of course, my friend.

Excuse us.

-See you next time.

Hello guys.

Anything for me?

An assault.

-Nobody cares anymore.

Are we going?

-I might have something for you.

That's good. Where's the body?

She's not dead.

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Jean Redon

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Crazy in the Noodle" STANDS4 LLC, 2022. Web. 3 Oct. 2022. <>.

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