Copperhead

The war between the states.

That's what Abner Beech called it.

It had been going on for a year...

...before it really got to us

in the upper part of New York state.

We were far from the battles.

At least, I thought we were.

They called us people in the north

that didn't want the war "copperheads."

I was just an orphan living with the Beeches,

but I was as big a copperhead as Abner.

Springtime, 1862.

That's when the war came home.

And nothing was ever the same again.

They're recruiting in Juno Mills.

What on earth for? The war is over.

A confessed failure, if you ask me.

You sound just like my pa.

- Your father is afraid of a fight?

- Hell, no.

Just don't like this war.

Only time I saw Abner use his fists on a fellow

creature was when we was starting school.

- You remember that?

- Heh, oh, yeah.

One of his hands cracks a stubborn cow

on the haunches with a shovel.

Abner, boom, knocks the man clear

through the fence post.

One day it's harsh as a blizzard,

the next, soft as sunshine.

It's the equinoctial.

The what?

Equinoctial.

You know what they say

down at the Corners.

It's, uh, pretty hard to figure if the

war's gonna stop in the next few days...

...or go on for much worse than ever.

Warner thinks we need to join up now.

Says if we wait any longer,

we're liable to miss the whole thing.

What's there to miss?

Defending your country, for starters.

Preserving the Union, for seconds.

Who'll farm the land and do the work

if we all go off to war?

Who invited you?

Since when does Warner Pitts

need an invitation?

Benjamin Wade,

Republican senator from Ohio, said:

"Anyone who quotes the Constitution

in this crisis is a traitor."

Traitor. The Constitution.

Oh, oh. But listen how a Democrat paper

in Ohio gave it right back to them.

"Such an abolitionist should be hung

till the flesh rots off his bones...

...and the winds of heaven whistle 'Yankee

Doodle' through his loathsome skeleton."

King me, Paddy. Ha!

Not listening to a word I've been reading?

Pa, I'm the checkers king.

Whipped old Hurley here.

We don't have kings in America.

Hurley will tell you that.

No, but we got slaves.

Jee Hagadorn getting inside

that head of yours?

The way to a woman's heart, boy,

ain't by rejecting your own kin...

...and parroting the asinine opinions

of her father.

How about a rollicking now, sis?

There'll be no rollicking

in this house, Ni.

I would be pleased to hear...

... "Am I Not a Man and Brother?"

Whatever Father wants.

Am I not a man and a brother?

Ought I not then to be free?

Sell me not to one another

Take not thus my liberty

Ought I not then to be free?

Did I carry the tune?

Carried the meaning.

You're a blessing to me, Esther.

You're a real blessing.

You play like...

Like an angel.

Just like your mother did.

Hmm.

The Camptown ladies

Sing this song, doo-da, doo-da

Camptown ladies sing this song

Oh, de doo-da day

Oh, de doo-da day

Oh, de doo-da day

Camptown ladies sing this song

Oh, de doo-da day

Whoo!

Thunder and lightning

are the judgments of divine will.

To put a lightning rod atop a building, atop

a temple consecrated to the Almighty...

...is an act of insolent defiance.

You cannot still the hand of God.

You cannot silence

the booming artillery of heaven.

Men know not whence cometh the wind.

We know only that the Lord rides the storm,

and he reaps the whirlwind.

It's nothing but foolishness.

"As lightning cometh from the east

and shineth in the west...

- ...so will be the coming of the Lord."

- Can you talk sense?

A lightning rod will keep this church

from burning down.

What the good Lord chooses to burn,

no man can prevent.

Be it bush or temple.

The Lord helps him who helps himself.

Jeff.

Esther.

And so we are justly proud that it was

a York state man, Charles Rand...

...who was the first to answer

President Lincoln's call for volunteers.

A little chalk dust is nothing compared

to the smoke of the Battle of Shiloh.

While some men frolic...

...others are trampling out the vintage

where the grapes of wrath are stored.

An apple for the teacher.

"A rose by any other name

would smell as sweet."

Who said that?

William Shakespeare.

- Father would have known that...

- Esther.

Now, there's a beautiful name.

This may sound silly to you,

but it's your name.

That's the matter.

- Beech?

- No. Jeff.

I just... I don't like saying it.

Why?

It's the name of the president

of the rebellion.

- A traitor.

- But it's my name too.

Middle name, anyways.

Thomas Jefferson Beech.

I was born with it

before Jeff Davis ever whistled "Dixie."

I know, it's just...

- Your first name is so much nicer.

- Thomas?

Let's just make it Tom.

Then call me Tom.

Tom.

Jeff.

Start the potatoes tomorrow.

Who you talking to?

Don't see any other Jeffs hereabouts.

You don't see one here neither.

I ain't Jeff no more.

Name's Tom.

Jeff is Jeff Davis.

I don't want no traitor name.

You're named after Thomas Jefferson,

you idiot. Is he a traitor?

Heh, no.

He's a slaver, though, wasn't he?

He wrote the Declaration of Independence,

you fool.

I don't imagine his slaves

was too independent.

Whatever you call yourself, you and Jimmy

are starting the potatoes tomorrow.

Or can't we call him Jimmy?

I don't know.

Who'd your parents name you for?

Likely, Jimmy Madison.

Is that okay with the Hagadorns?

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