Synopsis: An alien couple known as Beldar and Prymatt with cone-shaped heads from the planet called Remulak is mistakingly ditched on earth, during a scouting mission for planet conquest. While here, they dodge the INS, have a child and discover that life on Earth is quite good. But unfortunately they are being chased by the government who knows something is not quite right with the Conehead family. After they are rescued and taken back to their planet, Belder vows to return to earth and conquer it!
Genre: Comedy, Sci-Fi
Director(s): Steve Barron
Production: Paramount Vantage
  1 nomination.
Rotten Tomatoes:
88 min

Where's the Captain, Mr Spock?

He's out there, Doctor.

Out there somewhere in

a thousand cubic parsecs of space.

And there is absolutely nothing

we can do to help him.

Bogey inbound,

500 miles from Rockport.

- Roger, tac-com. You got it too?

- What is it?

I don't know. Signal has it

at 500 miles, inbound real fast.

That's not one of ours.

We've confirmed inbound bogey.

Werewolf, flight camera's now on.

Man, is he moving!

Unidentified aircraft,

you are violating

restricted airspace.

Reduce speed to mach one.

Descend to 3,000 feet and identify,

or we will force you down.

Bogey not responding.

He's walking away fast.

Suggest Air National Guard intercept.

This is Cowboy. I got a lock-on.

Request permission to fire.

You are cleared to fire.

Mebs, you should've activated

the cloaking device.

I cannot remember everything!

He's disappeared.

He's just disappeared!


- You need a room?

- Correct.

Fill out an application.

Just a form.

I seek out techno-industrial sector

where I can purchase

two simlats of platinum paste.

This time of night, huh?

Gee, let's see.

See, I'm kinda new to the area.

Where can I obtain a helium grafting

device operable at eight fathoms?

The day guy knows this area

really good. I can't help you.

- Is this a double occupancy?

- Correct. That is my mate.

Yeah, right. I'm sure she is.

That's... That's fine. OK.

Will that be cash or charge?

How will you pay for the room?

We shall remunerate

with metallic tender-discs.

- Correct.

- This is fine.

This is a primitive device.

We need one with the right components

to contact Remulak.

The Highmaster

will be displeased about our ship.

Affirmative. He will surely

cut off my plarg and hand it to me.

But do not despair.

We will be rescued.

Until then, we must adapt.

When the hydrogen droplets

have ceased,

we will live undetected

amongst the blunt skulls.

Beldar, how can we live

among the blunt skulls?

We will blend in.

My goodness, Mike Sanders. Wow.

Here's the man

that made it happen last match.

Hey, Otto, this dude's

almost as fast as you are.

No, this boy is the best.

Shows up on time,

gives me an honest day's work.

You can't find people like this.

That's right.

White boys and the brothers

show up late, loaf around.

- All they want is a cheque.

- I heard that.

Here is your Superjuicemaster.

Frequent cleaning of blades

will prevent wear

and accumulation of bacteria.

I told you, he's good.

If I could find three more like him,

I could retire.

It is time for midday cessation of

activities for protein-carbo intake.

- Sure. Take your lunch break.

- Lunch. Lunch.

The boy loves to eat.

Lunch. Lunch.

Greetings, earthwoman.

Time for midday consumption

of mass quantities.

I have re-radiated

leftover starch disc.

Pizza. I will enjoy it.

There. Warning. Do not sear

the top of your neck hole

in the molten lactate extract

of hoofed mammals.

Excellent. The final component

for the intergalactic communicator.



Perhaps tighten

the spiral dimension fasteners.

Beldar, activate the device!

Inform Marlax of our situation.

There is no advantage to delay.


Phone home!

Omglath Marlax.

We haven't heard from you

in clarsogs.

I'm glad your life functions

are active.

Greetings, Marlax.

I trust you have enslaved the planet.

Unanticipated failure

of mentaglion drive

has caused us to

abandon our vessel in a fluid mass.

At what time coordinates

can we expect a rescue vessel?

Rescue vessel? You tarpaath!

I'd not like to be in your cone

when the Highmaster hears this.

Rate this script:(2.00 / 1 vote)

Tom Davis

All Tom Davis scripts | Tom Davis Scripts

(0 fans)

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:



    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)


    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:


    "Coneheads" STANDS4 LLC, 2022. Web. 30 Nov. 2022. <>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer


    The Marketplace:

    Sell your Script !

    Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web!


    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.