Clueless

# Looking out a dirty, old window?

# Outside the cars in the city

go rushing by?

# I sit here alone, and I wonder why?

# Friday night and everyone's moving?

# I can feel the heat?

# But it's soothing?

# Heading down?

# I search for the beat

in this dirty town?

# Downtown, the young ones are going?

# Downtown, the young ones are growing?

# We're the kids in America?

# We're the kids in America?

So, O.K., you're probably going,

Is this, like,

a Noxema commercial or what?

But seriously,

I actually have a way normal life

for a teenage girl.

I mean, I get up, I brush my teeth.

And I pick out my school clothes.

# They do it over there?

# But we don't do it here?

# Ooh, bop?

# Fashion?

# Turn to the left?

# Fashion?

# Turn to the right?

# Ooh, fashion?

Daddy's a litigator.

Those are the scariest kinds of lawyers.

Even Lucy, our maid,

is terrified of him.

And Daddy is so good,

he gets $500 an hour

to fight with people.

He fights with me for free.

Daddy!

Cher, please don't start

with the juice again.

Daddy, you need your Vitamin C.

Where's my briefcase?

It's been a couple months now.

Let's go to Malibu.

Don't tell me those lowlifes

have been calling again.

They are your parents.

Don't sneak out of the office.

Dr. Lovett's giving you a flu shot.

Josh is coming for dinner.

Why?

He's your stepbrother!

You were hardly married to his mother.

Why do I have to see Josh?

You divorce wives, not children.

Here.

Forget it!

Did I show you

the loqued out Jeep Daddy got me?

It's got four-wheel drive,

dual side airbags,

and a monster sound system.

I don't have a license yet,

but I need something to learn on.

Boy! That came out of nowhere!

Here's where Dionne lives.

She's my friend

because we both know what it's like

to have people jealous of us.

- Girlfriend!

- I must give her snaps

for her courageous fashion efforts.

Hey, Cher.

Dionne and I were both named

after great singers of the past

who now do infomercials.

So?

Been shopping with Dr. Seuss?

I wouldn't skin a collie for a backpack.

It's faux.

Hello! That was a stop sign.

I totally paused.

Yeah. O.K.

It's not even 8:
30,

and Murray is paging me.

He is so possessive.

This weekend he called me,

and he's all, Where were you today?

Dionne and her boyfriend Murray

are in this dramatic relationship.

I think they've seen

that Ike and Tina Turner movie

just too many times.

Now, I have to say to her...

Why do you put up with it?

You could do better.

I know. Shh. Here he comes.

Woman, why don't you

be answering any of my pages?

I hate when you call me woman.

Where you been all weekend?

You jeepin' behind my back?

Jeepin'.

No! But speaking of vehicular sex,

perhaps you can explain

how this Kmart hair extension

got into the backseat of your car.

I don't know where that came from.

That looks like one of

your stringy something or anothers.

I do not wear polyester hair, O.K.?

Unlike Shawanna.

Dee, I'm Audi.

Bye.

That's it. I've had it with you.

Is it that time of the month again?

I don't know why

Dionne's going out

with a high school boy.

They're like dogs.

You have to clean them and feed them.

They're just like

these nervous creatures

that jump and slobber all over you.

Ew! Get off of me!

Oh, as if!

Should all oppressed people

be allowed refuge in America?

Amber will take the con position.

Cher will be pro.

Cher, two minutes.

So. O.K.

Like, right now, for example,

the Haiti-ans need to come to America.

Some people are all,

What about

the strain on our resources?

Like, when I had this garden party

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