Cheech and Chong's The Corsican Brothers

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History abounds

in stories of men...

who rose to meet

the challenge of destiny...

brave men, touched

by the fire and passion...

of revolution.

This is a story torn...

from the romantic and violent

pages of history...

a true story

of two noble brothers...

of the bond of sympathy

that united them...

and of their devotion

to a just cause.

Their daring adventures have

been too long unremembered...

and perhaps because they

did not seek personal glory.

But, on this bright summer day

in Paris...

fate is about to take a hand.

No!

1, 2...

Woolly bully,

please shave your jaws

Fromage

Woolly bully,

please shave your jaws

Woolly bully,

please shave your jaws

Fromage

Eggs and bacon marmalade

Everybody!

Woolly bully,

please shave your jaws

Fromage

Come on, everybody!

Woolly bully,

please shave your jaws

Fromage

Eggs and bacon marmalade

All right, got it!

OK, Sonny.

Go in there and check security.

All right, E..

Come on, sit down.

Coast clear.

I think I'll sit...

there.

Monsieur Schmengoid...

seafood plate.

Oh, man, no wonder Elvis

never toured over here.

They don't speak English.

Hey, how much money

we make today?

We made a pile today.

What's a schemgy worth today?

I don't know.

But don't you love it, man?

In America, they'd arrest us

for playin' on the street.

Here, they pay us to leave.

That's culture, hoss.

Don't you forget it.

Hey, what's this?

It's what you ordered.

Seafood plate.

Seafood plate.

Get it out of here!

Go on. The King's allergic.

Can't eat clams unless

they're attached to something.

Don't forget that.

Do you realize we've

revolutionized rock, man?

Do you know how many places...

we haven't played

where they won't want us?

That's a revolutionary thought.

Rock and roll, man.

That's what's gonna

change the world, you know?

A lot of people think

there's gonna be...

a revolution?

It's gonna be

a music revolution.

Rock and roll, man.

You! You have the mark!

Your arm! Your lip!

You have the mark!

He has the mark!

You have the mark!

Are you brothers?

Yeah, we're the Marx Brothers.

I have something

so important to tell you.

But first...I need money.

Give her some money.

It's coming...

I need more money...

It's coming...

Give her some more money.

She'll come quicker.

Money, more money...

OK.

I'll tell you the first part.

She'll tell us the first part.

A long time ago, on an island

far, far away...

Even before their birth...

the lives of the brothers were

marked by irony and intrigue.

Their father was a rich

and powerful aristocrat...

and, had it not been

for a romantic indiscretion...

of his passionate young wife...

our heroes might have been

raised as gentlemen...

and we would

have no story to tell.

...boiling water.

Basins of it!

Le chaud, le chaud!

Go away!

Widen it!

You can see the hole!

Pull...

and...

get the bar behind you!

Pull it out...

right now!

Push!

And push!

Push!

Work on it!

Push!

Push! Come on!

It's coming.

Fine!

Now, pull, pull!

Pull!

Pull!

Pull...

Oh, we made it!

Oh...

Thank God!

Now--

Oh my God!

Despite the tragic loss

of their fathers...

Lucien and Louie,

as they were called...

spent a happy childhood

humbly raised as peasants.

Ma! Ma! Ma!

Let's have it.

Mine!

Their humble upbringing

could not disguise the fact...

that these

were no ordinary peasants.

They betrayed their origins...

by a bond of sympathy

so extraordinary...

that each

could feel the joy or pain...

of the other in his place.

And as the years passed...

this would prove to be

a heavy load to bear.

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